Only love can hurt like this
by thispurplegal
Summary: This is my first fanfic and I hope you all like it. Nick and Jess have been apart of a year now after Jess broke up with him without an explanation. After meeting again they get back together but the reason Jess left him before comes back into her life. Will she chose to run away again or finally tell him what's going on? Will Nick stay with her? Inspired by a PurpleGrl fanfic. :)
1. A life without Jess

Only love can hurt like this

**_Authors Note: _**

**_Hello everyone. Thank you so much for deciding to read my first fanfic, I'm really excited! I don't know if my writing is any good but I really enjoy it and I wanted to share this story with you all! This story was slightly inspired by _****_PurpleGrl_****_'_****_s Ness fanfic "_****_The One That Got Away_****_"_****_. I really like it and I recommend her stories. As some of you may or may not know, the title is also a song by Paloma Faith. I love her and this song. I have been listening to her nonstop and it's been really great to listen to her while I write! I was also really stuck on the titles name and realised that it would be perfect for it. By the way, I'm from England and I am trying to keep using American words (elevator not lift, sidewalk not pavement etc.) just to keep the story in its true setting but if I slip up now and again, please forgive me. _****_J_********_I don't own New Girl or any of the characters. Just thought I'd tell you. I hope there aren't any mistakes but I'm sorry if there are. Anyway, thanks again and without further ado, here is the first chapter of my first fanfiction, "Only love can hurt like this."_**

**_-A_**

Chapter One- Life Without Jess

It had been a year since Jess had left and it had been hard on Nick. Really hard. Harder than his Dads funeral. Harder than Caroline. Harder than law school. He didn't sleep. He didn't go to work and he stayed in his room for a whole month, only coming out to get more booze. He didn't know what he had done. "Why d'ya leave me, Jess? We had an argument before you left but we always argued, even before we were together", he'd drunkenly slur to himself as he tried to figure out what he had exactly done to make her leave. He went over that day in his head a thousand and one times, watching her stare at him with her beautiful blue eyes, huge, glassy and tearing up, as she said she couldn't do it anymore. "I need to stop this", he told himself, taking another swig of good ol' Jack Daniel's. Every time he imagined her beautiful face, a picture of perfection, staring at him in disbelief, his heart would sink and break all over again and the pain it caused was unbearable.

_"__I'm not doing this with you anymore. I'm sorry". _It sounded so harsh and he would have hated her for being so casual about it if she didn't look at him the way she did and if she didn't say it in the way she did. He knew she was in the same amount of pain as him and that just confused him even more. "Why, if it was that painful, did ya still leave me?" He couldn't figure it out. Maybe it wasn't painful for her. Maybe she honestly didn't love him as much as he loved her. These thoughts haunted him. It really scared him to think that there might have been a possibility that she never really loved him. But he knew they were wrong, that she did love him and he couldn't shake off the look on her face after he asked her that damn question. He couldn't forget the sound of her voice breaking when she said, _"__Why would you even think to ask that? I love you!"_

"God! Why am I such an idiot? She said she loved me! She said it! Why did I push her?" He dropped his head into his hands and drank again, trying to forget the pain. His love for her felt like it was killing him.

In the second month, Schmidt and Winston knew that if they didn't help Nick get out of his mess now, they would never be able to get him out and back to normal. It took a lot of work, but after weeks of trying, they finally managed to convince him that Jess would come back and when she did, he would need his act together. "Come on. Do you think she's ever going to take you back while you're like this? I mean look at you Nicholas! You look like a hobo. A chubby, damaged hobo, with, well, a terrible metabolism. I'm still confused as to why she was with you in the first place."

"Okay Schmidt, real helpful!" Winston said, cutting Schmidt off before he caused any more damage. "Look Nick. We know you love her, we've known from the beginning! And we know she loves you. So stop this man. Seriously, it's not safe for Ferguson to walk around the loft anymore and this is defiantly not good for you! Get up. Get in the shower and go make sure you still have a job." He could see this little pep talk was going nowhere so quickly added "for Jess, man!" That did it.

So that's when Nick Miller went back to work and back to living a life of bartending and sleeping. Luckily, it had been a very slow month at the bar and with a little of Big Bobs help, he got his job back. He still thought about Jess every second of every day though. About how happy he used to be. About how lucky he was to wake up in the morning and see her sleeping beside him, her curled dark locks falling gracefully on his pillow, eyes closed and breathing lightly, pulling him closer and sighing sweetly in her sleep as he looked at her, with a goofy grin on his sleepy face, completely in awe of her beauty and a little more than confused as to why she was actually with him. Or when he'd wake up to the clanging and crashing of pans and plates. He'd get up, smiling, as he'd walk into the kitchen to find Jess, his Jess, wrapped in one of his flannel shirts, humming along to her own little song while she pushed her glasses up the slender bridge of her little nose, and made them eggs and coffee. It was his favourite sight. He could never get enough of it. Of her. Of watching her make breakfast or sleep or fix her bangs while she got ready for the day, oblivious to his stares and talking about something Schmidt had done or what she had planned. He really missed her. And when times got too hard, when he'd get home late from a back-to-back shift at the bar and just needed to walk in and see his girlfriend waiting for him on the couch, in one of her signature pyjama outfits, watching TV, he was only greeted with an empty, quiet loft. Every time, he would look down, disappointed, tears burning in his dark eyes and would go to the fridge to grab a beer and fall to couch, eyes closed, sighing deeply and thinking of how she would look at him, pouting her small, red lips slightly, upset at how tired and stressed he was, and snuggling closer, telling him not to worry. Her sweet smell and warm hug was always comforting and made him think that everything would get better and he wished he could stay in that moment forever, wished she was still in his arms, loving him. It was like that for the remainder of the year. Nick would think about how Jess would sometimes surprise him at work when he had a late one and how her excited smile and quick sweet kiss would give him all the energy in the world. He would think about how she would sneak into his room at night after an argument and slip under the covers, carefully placing her head on his chest while he tried to cover up a smile. He always failed and couldn't resists grabbing her, sliding his arm around her tiny waist to bring her closer and kiss her as she'd let out a cute giggle. She knew they were both over whatever they were arguing about, and would happily whisper, _"__Goodnight Nick", _before squeezing him tighter as they both fell asleep, smiles plastered on their faces. He wanted that back so bad! He wanted Jess and no-one else. But after a night out with Schmidt, he did meet a girl and they started dating but he couldn't keep it up. Not with Jess constantly on his mind. He knew it wasn't fair to either of them, so broke it off with her in the same week, before they did anything. She didn't seem so bothered and they easily went their separate ways.

It was ten twenty-three on a Saturday night and Nick was at work, wiping down the bar after throwing out a bunch of lads for trying to cause trouble. It had got very quiet and everything slowed down after that which was surprising. It was always a little crowed on a Saturday at this time but he wasn't bothered. For some reason he couldn't stop thinking about Jess. He was always thinking about Jess, but for some reason, on this particular day, he couldn't stop. Usually at work, he would be too busy to stop and think about her and he made sure he was always doing something so he wouldn't slip into a Jess induced, coma-like state. But on that day, even while he was serving customers or talking to someone, all he could think about was Jess, and no matter what he did he couldn't stop. He kept seeing her dark hair falling over her shoulders, her big blue eyes sparkling like two orbs of beauty behind her dark frames and her pale, slender body in a sweet red dress that he loved on her. It must have been obvious that something was on his mind because at that moment Big Bob slapped his huge hand on Nick's back and told him to sit down for the rest of his shift, which was another half an hour. Nick tried to refuse but Bob was adamant and told him he would take it from there and after Nick thanked him and went to sit down on the opposite side of the bar, Big Bob handed him a whiskey and a cold beer before moving down the far side of the bar to deal with a customer. Nick didn't take any notice of the small woman at the very end of the bar and just smiled. Big Bob always knew when something was up and knew what Nick needed. Whiskey and beer. First something nice and strong for a quick buzz, which drowned any pain immediately and then something colder and weaker to hold the buzz. He necked the whiskey back, picked up his beer and took a swig. In mid-flow he suddenly heard a voice making him stop dead in his tracks and slowly put his beer down on the bar. He stayed completely still as he heard the sweet little voice say, "Erm, just a pink wine. Thanks Bob."

To Be Continued…

**_A/N:_**

**_Thank you for reading, there will defiantly be more chapters. We're only getting started! The next chapter will include more of Nick and Jess together! I hope you liked it and please comment telling me what you think, I need as much constructive criticism for me to improve my writing and the story, so any comments will be really helpful. If there's something you want to see in the next chapters, do tell me. I love incorporating new ideas! Thanks again guys! _****_J_******


	2. I missed you

**_A/N:_**

**_Hello again. Welcome back to my story. I hope you guys will like this chapter and like the general idea of the story once more is uploaded. Enjoy! _**

**_-A_**

_He necked the whiskey back, picked up his beer and took a swig. In mid-flow he suddenly heard a voice making him stop dead in his tracks and slowly put his beer down on the bar. He stayed completely still as he heard the sweet little voice say, "Erm, just a pink wine. Thanks Bob."_

Chapter 2: I missed you

He stared at the alcohol bottles at the back of the bar, eyes wide and nervous. He couldn't believe his ears. Pink wine! It couldn't be a coincidence, could it? What was he thinking? It couldn't be Jess. It wouldn't be Jess. Why would she go to the bar where he worked? She was the one that left him, so there must have been a reason and if there was a reason, why would she then go somewhere, where she knew she'd see him? Unless…"Maybe she wanted to see me? Maybe she missed me and wants me back. Maybe she-", he cut himself off, shaking his head of his thoughts. "Don't be stupid, Nick", he told himself. He knew he was building himself up for disappointment but he couldn't help it. That beautiful voice was way too familiar. He knew that voice so well now. He had heard it coming out his best friend's mouth for two years, from his girlfriends for another year and in his dreams every single night since she left. That silky, sweet voice was music to his ears and made him relax and tense up at the same time when it ordered a pink wine. No one ever ordered pink wine and Nick would always tease Jess about it which would always annoy her and make her frown, a cute, little frown. He smiled to himself as he pictured her looking at him, eyebrows down and a little crinkle between them as she picked up her "girly" drink and took a proud, exaggerated gulp, making him chuckle. He wanted that back. He wanted to tease her and laugh with her again, even if they were just friends. He wanted his Jess back. "Oh, hey Bob, could you also get me something with tequila in it? We're gonna need something strong!" He heard the woman chuckle after saying that and he knew it had to be her. Tequila wasn't really her drink but he knew it was Jess. Her voice, her cute little laugh and the fact that she knew Big Bob's name. He didn't pick up on it before, but this time he heard it as clear as day. No, it was definitely Jess! Big Bob wasn't much of a talker and would never tell a random customer his name unless they were a regular. But then again, maybe she just over heard it or something. "Now, Nick. Let's not lose your head over a voice!" He imagined Schmidt was there and said it in his voice to get himself to listen. It didn't work. Especially after he heard Bob laugh too and say, "Sure thing, Jess." Oh come on. It was her. This couldn't be one big coincidence! No. Jess was back from where ever she was hiding and she was ordering her signature drink at her ex-boyfriends bar! "Ok Nick. Let's do this!" Nick took in a big lungful and a swig of his beer before wiping his mouth and straightening his shirt. "You don't have to talk to her, you can just look and check if it is her. Stop getting so nervous for God's sake. You know her! She's not some random chick. She's Jess. Your Jess…well she was your Jess. Oh God, why is this so hard? Just turn around. She obviously hasn't seen you yet. Turn around!" He started to feel a little weird that he kept talking to himself and not to her so he took one last breath and slowly turn his head to the end of the bar, trying to be discrete. As soon as he turned, he caught his breath and his heartbeat went crazy. It was Jess alright! She was so beautiful. Her long raven curls fell down one shoulder as the other side was neatly pinned up. Her perfect bangs fell over her forehead, feathering her eyebrows. She wore a tight red dress that hugged each and every curve perfectly, showing of her slender body. She seemed to have lost a little bit of weight but she still looked healthy and beautiful and herself. He watched as a smile formed on her ruby red lips and she thanked Big Bob. She picked up the drinks a turned around and that was when Nick saw her face properly. She wore dark eyeliner and mascara which made her eyes look even bigger. Her slightly blushed cheeks and red lips look perfect but didn't draw any attention away from her beautiful eyes. They were still as big and as blue as he remembered and they sparkled despite the poor lighting in the bar. She didn't seem to notice Nick as she got up, and went to a booth where she sat by herself and slowly took a little sip from her glass, looking around as if she was waiting for someone. He couldn't believe it. She was there. She was actually there, sitting in the booth he had seen her in so many times before, sipping pink wine and waiting. He felt like he could cry out in relief or maybe pain as he pinched his thigh to make sure it wasn't just another dream. "Nope", he winced. "Not a dream!" He cleared his throat and finished off his drink. "Ok. Now's your chance. Just go over and talk to her. You can do this, Nicholas! You've done more than talk to her in the past, so you can do this!" He was about to get up when he heard her phone ringing and quickly went back to his original place, as if her phone would give him away. "Hello", he heard her ask. He hoped it was a wrong number so she would hang up and he could go over and talk to her sooner. He realised that all the little voices in his head that told him not to go over to her and to give her space had disappeared and was replaced by voices that reminded him of all the good times they had together and how much he actually loved her and how much she loved him. He almost forgot they weren't together and nearly got up to walk over to her, grab her face and kiss her. But he stopped himself and waited for her phone call to end. "You're not coming? You said you'd do this with me! I even ordered you a drink", he knew that tequila wasn't hers. "Ok fine. But promise you won't be too late tonight. We need to get up early tomorrow." There was a slight pause before she said, "Ok babe, be safe. Bye."

"Babe?" oh God he was too late. Of course she was with someone. She was gorgeous and people were always on her, especially when she dressed up. "You are an idiot, Nick! You didn't call her or try to find her or anything! And now look. She's with someone else, calling them babe and kissing them and laughing with them! And you can't say anything because you didn't even fight for her! For us! So stupid!" He dropped his head in his hands as he mentally beat himself up and it felt like he was losing her all over again! Bob came over and placed another whiskey beside Nick, catching his attention, and offered and sympathetic look before leaving him alone again. He picked up the glass and swirled the contents around before drinking it in one gulp and slamming the glass down again. He could feel the tears burning in his eyes again but pushed them back. He was not going to sit there and pathetically cry into his empty glass while the love of his life was sitting only meters away and thinking about some other man. Probably some jerk of a guy that will end up breaking her heart. Nick wanted to hurt him already, but what could he do. He was the ex now and nothing he could say would have any effect. It wasn't his place any more. His words held no power and it really had nothing to do with him. He looked up and saw Bob wiping down the bar. "Hey Bob, gonna need another one" Nick said as he lifted his glass. He wasn't very loud but he was loud enough for Jess to hear and as soon as she heard that voice, her head shot up from her phone and looked in the direction of the voice.

She was very nervous that night. She hadn't seen Nick in a year and wasn't sure how he would react if he saw her. She looked in the mirror on her bedroom door, not her choice but it was there before her, so she wasn't going to move it, and sighed. She thought it was too much. The dress, the make-up. She didn't want to look desperate or slutty. She just wanted to see him again, but she had made the silly mistake of telling Cece and she took matters into her own hands.

"Ok babe, I'll do your hair and makeup, oh, and you have to wear that little red dress!"

"Cece…"

"You know the tight one with the sweetheart neckline. Yes, you're going to look so good!

"Cece!"

"One look at you and he's gonna see what he's been missing and come running!"

"CECE!"

"Ah, Jess, what the hell? Do you want me to go deaf? God!"

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It's just, I don't want that. I just want to see Nick again but I don't want to, looking like some cheap tramp!" Jess sighed. She really missed Nick. She couldn't stop thinking about him during the past year. His flannel shirts, his silly grin, and his messy bed head when he woke up after and fun night. She wanted to see him again and she wanted to do so looking like herself. Jessica Day. Not some random bar chick!

"You won't Jess. Not while I'm here. I promise you'll look like you, just with a little more…life in you. Trust me!"

Jess took one last look in the mirror, sighing while fixing her hair quickly, and grabbed her little purse before opening the door and walking out of her room and into her and Cece's apartment. "Jess, you look amazing stop worrying and just trust me! This is part of my job, so I like to think I know a little more about dressing up than you", Cece said as Jess walked into their living room with a less than convinced look on her face. She sighed for the hundredth time the evening and looked at Cece.

"I don't know Ceec. Maybe this isn't such a good idea. I mean after what happened, maybe I should just let him move on. What if he has a girlfriend and I come in and mess everything up. Or what if he actually hates me and throws me out of the bar. I don't know if I can take that Cece!"

"Jess, honey, calm down! Do you love him?"

"What?" Jess seemed at little nervous when she asked that. She had no idea why. Of course she loved him and it wasn't like she wasn't allowed, they were together! But for some reason she felt as if she had to hide her feelings, like it wasn't her place to love him anymore, like she needed to let go.

"Do you love him, Jessica?" Cece repeated. She wasn't going to drop it.

"Yes. Happy now? I love him. I, Jessica Day, am in love with Nicholas Miller! I haven't been able to forget him and I love him!" For some reason she seemed a little annoyed that she had to say it out loud but they both knew it was because she was nervous and because she wasn't sure if Nick felt the same. "Then stop stressing. This is Nick we're talking about here. He could never hate you and you said so yourself, he told you he fell in love with you the moment you walked through the door! Feelings like that don't just disappear…trust me…" Cece trailed off and Jess realised she must have been thinking about Schmidt. She grabbed her hand and smiled as Cece looked up at her. "Ok then, you're all ready and it's getting late. You better go before he leaves!"

"Wait, Cece. Why aren't you ready? I thought you were coming with me!" Jess said, starting to panic again as she noticed her friend was wearing a vest top and sweatpants with her long dark hair in a pretty plait. "Jess, stop worrying! You leave first and order me a drink, something strong, I feel like dancing tonight, and I'll quickly get ready and meet you at the bar. I promise." Cece looked at her and smiled as she put out her fist, pinkie extended, as she said promise. Jess flashed her a smile before giggling like a six year old and lifted her pinkie before wrapping it around her best friends. They both let out a childish laugh before Jess took a deep breath and said, "Ok then! Wish me luck!" and left the apartment with a hopeful look on her face. Cece always made her feel like a child and she loved her for everything she had done for her, especially over that year.

She made it to the bar and walked in noticing Big Bob working the bar by himself. She couldn't see Nick and she almost felt a little relieved. She realised when she walked into the bar, which had become like a second home for her and her three friends, who she missed like crazy, that she would need a little Dutch courage before she could talk to him. It was so stupid. They had done a lot more than talk before and they knew each other on a level that no one else could ever understand but she was still a nervous wreck, shaking at the thought of talking to him. She went over to the bar and ordered a pink wine, forgetting Cece was going to meet her there. "Oops," she thought as she took a sip of her wine. "Oh, hey Bob could you also get me something with tequila in it? We're gonna need something strong!" She chuckled at the thought of Cece jumping and dancing around and suddenly realised that although she needed her with her, she might be able to make it through the night by herself. Jess' heart flew as she heard Big Bob laugh and say, "Sure thing, Jess." He said my name! He remembers me! Suddenly, all the pain and nerves she had felt throughout the year, and on that night especially, disappeared. She felt at home and safe. After Big Bob passed her the drink, she picked them up and moved from the bar to a booth. She missed this place and loved the feelings and memories it brought back. Memories of her and the guys laughing and drinking at the bar, while Nick served them and constantly teased her about drinking pink wine. She would never admit it out loud but she loved it when Nick teased her. It felt warm and friendly and always made butterflies in her tummy. She would always have to take a big gulp, or look away after shooting him a frown, to try and cover up her smile. She missed him a lot and there was nothing more she wanted then to see his rugged, unshaven face again, teasing her and chuckling. She realised just how she missed that, even before they were together and she just wanted to talk to him again. Not about the break up, or any of their problems but about silly things like pink wine and whiskey or the difference between Dirty Dancing and Ghost or why she watched them in the first place. She sat down in the booth, smiling and took a little sip of wine while she looked around hoping to spot Nick somewhere. She put her wine down and moments later her phone started ringing. "Hello?" she asked.

"Hey Jess, it's me! Look, I won't be able to make it tonight. I saw some guys on the way there and one thing led to another and now we're at a club!" She wasn't lying. Cece was shouting down the phone as the music loudly played in the background. Jess suddenly felt all the confidence she had before slip away. She needed Cece. She needed someone. The thought of talking to Nick went from the eagerness she felt only a few seconds earlier to a slightly sickie feeling which scared her slightly. "You're not coming? You said you'd do this with me! I even ordered you a drink!" She was starting to panic again and hoped Cece would change her mind and come to the bar like they planned, like she promised! "I'm sorry babe! But maybe this is just what you need! Alone time with Nick to talk and to get your feelings out! Where did that hopeful Jess go? Where did the Jess that shouted out that she loved Nick Miller go? You can do this and you don't need me or anyone else. You need Nick!" She was right! She could this! "Ok fine. But promise you won't be too late tonight. We need to get up early tomorrow."

"No problem! If I'm not back when you get home, call me and I'll leave straight away, okay?"

"Ok babe, be safe. Bye." She hung up and took a deep breath. "I can do this!" She continued to look at her phone to check the time and decide what time she should leave before she heard as glass on the bar. That didn't faze her at all, not until a few moments later she heard a gruff voice say, "Hey Bob, gonna need another one." Her head shot up to see who it was. She knew exactly who it was! Nick Miller. She couldn't believe it. She walked right into the bar and ordered her drinks and didn't even notice him. She must have been so engrossed in the feel of the bar and talking to Big Bob that she didn't even see the man she had come to see. Nick! Her Nick…well he was her Nick. She suddenly froze. All she wanted to do was walk up to him, tap him on the shoulder, and when he turned around, grab him and kiss him like they were still together, but she couldn't move. All of her muscles had stiffened and her eyes went wider than ever before. "Come on Jessica! You can do this!" She took a deep breath and downed the rest of her drink. "Let's go!"

As she got up, she straightened her dress and her hair and starting slowly walking towards the man sitting at the bar necking back, what looked like, a whiskey. She winced, scrunching up her face, as he drank and she let her mind wonder, thinking about how he always did that and never reacted in any way. Before she knew it his glass was empty and put in front of him while he leant on the bar and she stood right behind him. She saw his back raising and falling as he breathed in and out. She had seen this sight so many times in the past, usually in bed while he slept, but it didn't stop her heart from beating faster. She could hear her heart in her ears and she wondered if he could hear it too. She took in a deep breath and tapped him on the shoulder. He didn't turn around, like she expected, instead he just grunted. "Great!" she thought. "I have to use my voice now!" She was so nervous; her hands were actually shaking as she squeezed her purse and cleared her throat. Time for confident Jess to come out! "Hey stranger. Need another drink?"

Despite her nerves, her words came out clear and confident. "Thank you wine!" she thought. As soon as she spoke, he seemed to stop moving, stop breathing and slowly, very slowly. Excruciatingly slowly, he pushed himself up off the bar and straightening his back like a ruler. She breathed in and hoped she didn't start to panic when she saw his face.

Slowly he turned to look at her. She missed that face! And instead of panic and nerves filling her, she felt the butterflies in her stomach go wild and felt a huge grin fall across her face. It seemed to take him a moment to focus but a second later his dark beautiful eyes went wide as he gulped and whispered, "Jess…"

It was so quite she wasn't sure he said anything until he shook his head to wake himself up and spun around fully. "Jess! W-What are you doing here?" He seemed to be relieved or excited or maybe just confused, she couldn't tell but when her smile widened and he smiled back, she knew he didn't hate her.

Nick was amazed! Jess had come to him! She never did that to anyone. She always waited because she didn't want to embarrass herself, but she actually went to him! Not only that but she even tapped him on the shoulder and said, a little flirtatiously, "Hey stranger. Need another drink?" When he turned around, he didn't really come to terms with the fact that Jess was there, lightly flirting with him! He felt his eyes go wide as he realised, for the second time that night that he wasn't dreaming and knew that was his Jess. He whispered her name and asked why she was there. "Nice Nick! You haven't seen her for a year and she's all you can think about, but you ask why she's there? Idiot!" He was scared she would take it as him asking her to leave and as he went to correct himself, he saw her beautiful smile get bigger and he knew she knew what he meant. Her smile was always so infectious and he couldn't help but smile back at the beautiful girl in front of him. "Erm" Nick said clearing his throat and remembering her offer. "I'd love a drink. You? If I remember correctly, pink wine is your chosen poison." She giggled at his offer and sat down next to him at the bar. He watched as she placed herself gently on the bar stool, suck in her smile, looking at him and gave him a slow nod, trying to act sophisticated. He laughed and called Big Bob over, ordering her a wine and a beer for himself. He didn't want to get drunk when he was sitting there with Jess. He needed to be as sober as possible so he could talk to her. He felt like everything was ok again. He thought that if he'd ever see her again, it would be upsetting and awkward but it was nothing like that at all. He laughed. Genuinely laughed and he couldn't believe that a second ago he was drinking over the fact that she had a boyfriend…oh yeah! As Bob passed them their drinks, Nick's smile disappeared. It felt so good having Jess near but he would never get to be with her with a boyfriend hanging around. He sighed as he took a sip of his beer and turned to Jess as he heard her start to talk. "It's so great to see you, Nick" she said enthusiastically. "How are you?" He tried to forget about the boyfriend for now and just enjoy catching up with Jess. He smiled softly again before saying, "Great. I'm great! Erm…I missed you though." He didn't want to bring that up straight away because he didn't want her to lose that smile but she didn't! Her eyes just glistened as she blushed slightly before saying, "I really missed you too Nick!" He felt like he couldn't breathe! "She missed me?" He couldn't contain his emotions and a little laugh of relief and excitement slipped between his smiling lips. "So, er, what's going on with you, Day?" She blushed again when he called her Day. He remembered she loved that! "Well Miller, nothing much. I moved in with Cece after Nadia left and I've just been keeping busy…"

"Keeping busy?" he thought, thinking about the boyfriend again! She cleared her throat, interrupting his thoughts before asking, "So are you…with anyone?" immediately regretting the decision to ask that question. It was way too forward, too soon but he didn't seem to mind. "Nope. Just me and the guys." He laughed nervously and quickly retaliated with the same question. He wanted to seem as chilled as possible but inside he was panicking. He knew she was with someone, remembering the conversation with "Babe" earlier, but was scared to hear her actually say that she had moved on. But to his surprise she said, "No. I've been 'out of the game' for a bit. I haven't had the time. It's just me and Cece." She smiled and he looked at her confused. He heard her talking earlier, he heard her say babe. "What? Really? I thought you had a boyfriend." Now she was confused. They hadn't talked in a year so where would he get that idea? "No. No boyfriend. Why would you think I did?" She was honestly confused and wanted to know. Before he could stop himself he blurted out, "I heard you talking to him on the phone." As soon as he said that he started to panic. "You idiot! Now she knows you were eaves dropping and she knows you saw her before she came over. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid!" He couldn't believe he'd just said that and held his breath as he waited for a response. "Oh really? Is that right, Miller? So you saw me but you didn't think to say hello?" Her voice was playful and she obviously didn't care that much but Nick was in panic mode and heard her say it seriously. "Yes. Jess I'm sorry. I didn't think you'd wanna talk to me or see me and I know you hate it when people-"Jess put her hand over his mouth playful and laughed at his seriousness. "Geez, Nick it was a joke," she said through laughs. "I'm gone for a year and you lose you sense of humour?" She moved her hand from his mouth and they both chuckled. "I was talking to Cece." She said, clearing up the misunderstanding. He sighed, a little more than relieved and said, "I missed ya, Day!" She giggled one last time before saying, "I missed you too, Miller!"

**_To Be Continued…_**

**_A/N:_**

**_Wow, that was longer than I intended. Sorry! I hope there weren't any mistakes and I don't own new girl. More chapters will be uploaded soon and I hope you like this so far. Thank you to everyone that's reading this, it really means a lot! Thanks again! Bye_******

**_-A_**


	3. His worst nightmare

**_A/N:_**

**_Third chapter now. It's not as long as the last chapter but I hope you like it!_**

**_-A_**

_"__I missed ya, Day!" She giggled one last time before saying, "I missed you too, Miller!"_

Chapter 3: His worst nightmare…

_I don't know what to do! She wouldn't do that to me, would she? No, of course she wouldn't. She said she loves me! But if not, what else could it be? What else could she be doing at this time? I sat there on the couch and thought about Jess, waiting for her to return. Images of her lying in bed with some random guy, smiling, as he kissed her before she got up to get changed and leave, flashed through my mind. Jess wouldn't do that. Please, God, say she wouldn't do that! I stood up as I heard the front door open. I watched her as she walked into the loft and headed for her bedroom, something obviously playing on her mind. I walked over to her, cutting into her path and she looked up at me slowly and I saw her eyes were slightly puffy and red. Was she crying? Were the hell had she gone? She left me in bed at eight in the morning and it was getting on for nine. At night! What could she possible have been doing for thirteen hours!? Her eyes were glassy and unreadable. I couldn't tell if she had been crying because she was angry or annoyed or guilty, like I normally could. What was going on? She moved closer, slowly and silently, bringing her arms up to hug me but I needed to know what was happening with her. I stepped back and she threw me a confused look. I didn't want to hurt her, I just needed to know. "Where have you been Jess?" My voice sounded cold but I couldn't control it. I was upset and I was angry! She didn't respond. She just looked down, away from me, breaking eye contact. It was silent for about a minute and I knew she wasn't going to answer me, but I wanted her to tell me the truth. "Jess, where d'ya go?" My voice cut through the silence and she looked up at me, her eyes bigger and glassier than before. She looked at me, hurt and obviously did not wanting to have a conversation now, but I wasn't going to sit back on this one. I had to know the truth! "Jess!" My voice was louder than I wanted and she flinched at the sudden volume. I hated seeing her like that. I hated seeing her cry and I'd never ever want to scare her but I couldn't control the anger from bubbling out. If she wasn't doing anything, if she really had a valid reason to be out for hours on end every single day, why wasn't she talking? Why wasn't she explaining herself? My breathing by now had got deeper and faster as I tried to keep my anger and volume under control before saying, "Talk to me, Jess!" She seemed to take a deep, shaky breath as she closed her eyes and said, "I was with Cece…" Her voice was broken and gravelly, sounding sore and like she was losing it. "With Cece? For thirteen hours?" My voice was getting louder again. She must be hiding something. Why wasn't she telling me? She would usually talk for hours about her journey to the shop and back. "Come on Jess. What's really going on?"_

_"__Nothing. You asked where I was, and I told you. I was with Cece, what else do you want?"_

_"__I want to know what's really going on with you! You've been going out a lot lately and you've completely stopped talking to me! Weren't you the one that always wanted to share our feelings?!"_

_"__I told you! I've been busy at work! I can't help it that I've got a lot more now that I'm the vice principle. Jesus Nick! All I want to do after a long day of work, is come home to my boyfriend without having to explain every single stressful detail!"_

_"__So you were working now? A second ago, you were with Cece!" My voice was harsh and I felt bad, but the reasonable Nick had been drowned out by paranoia and jealousy hours ago. _

_"__I WAS! I went somewhere first thing this morning and then I wanted to see my friend, Nick! What the hell is wrong with you? Why are you acting like this?"_

_"__Why am __**I**__acting like this? Why are __**you**__acting so damn suspicious all the time? You seem different, Jess. You've stopped humming and singing all the time, you've stopped smiling and you've completely stopped elaborating on things. I ask you a question; you give me brief answer and expect me to just leave it there! Where did you go before meeting Cece, huh? What is such a big secret that you can't even tell me?" She went quiet after I said that and was breathing heavily, her eyes wide with frustration. I could hear my own breathing, deep and heavy as I waited for an answer. "I-I went to school to pick up some things to work on." Her voice seemed a little uncertain and I knew she must be lying. I wasn't going to drop this one. "Where is it then, Jessica? Where's all that work?" I gestured to her empty hands and she seemed to panic slightly before saying, "I left it at Cece's house! She told me to relax and stop working all the time and made me leave it behind." I wasn't sure. What was she doing to be away for so long? "And that took you thirteen hours?"_

_"__Yes, Nick! I didn't want to do nothing at all so I did as much work as I could before going out with Cece. Ok?" I trusted Jess but for some reason I couldn't let this one go. There was something she wasn't telling me! "Ok fine, you were working with Cece. But then tell me Jess, truthfully, what have you been doing all the other times?" She stared at me and the blatant look of panic was now clear in her eyes! I didn't like. She was quiet for a bit before shouting, "Why are you asking me all of this, Nick?" Ok this had to end now! _

_"__Are you cheating on me!?" I didn't realise how loudly I said it and again she flinched away, fear and pain clouded her eyes. I looked at her, as a hurt look fell on her face and tears prickled in her eyes. "Wha-What?" she merely whispered. "Why would…Do you not trust me, Nick?" _

_"__Yes or no, Jess?" She stared at me in disbelief. Of course I trusted her, but I couldn't control my jealousy with Jess. She was so perfect in every way and so beautiful, guys were always trying it on with her and I didn't want to lose her. It wasn't that I didn't trust her, it was just, well I was scared she would realise that she could do better than an agoraphobic, turtle-faced, borderline-alcoholic and leave. "No, Nick! Of course not! Why would you even think to ask that? I love you!" She was fully crying now, hurt-felt tears streaming down her flushed cheeks. "I would never do that to anyone, especially not you! You know what I went through with Spencer. I could never ever do that to you Nick!" I felt so guilty. How could I think she would do that? She was the love of my life and I knew exactly what had happened with Spencer! I'm such an idiot. "Jess, I'm so-" _

_"__You know what Nick? Save it!" She shouted at me and let her tears fall before she quietly stammered, "I-I don't think I can do this anymore…" My heart stopped. Please say she wasn't thinking of leaving! "I love you so much, more than anyone else but I don't know if I can carry on any more. You don't trust me Nick and that hurts! It just doesn't feel like you love me at all!" She was still crying but was wiping every tear away before they could tumble down her smooth cheeks. It felt like my heart had given up and I could feel the salty venom stinging my eyes. "I don't love you? Jess, you mean everything to me! If I didn't love you, I wouldn't be trying to change for you! The bank account, moving in with you, being Schmidt's lawyer! It was all for you! It was my way to show you I could change into someone that was good for you!" Despite my feelings of pain and regret, we were both shouting at each other. "You are good for me, Nick!" Jess was screaming now! "God, why do you always listen to everyone else when it comes to us? Then don't know what I want or what I need! I don't care about money or whether you're a lawyer or not! I only care about the man I fell in love with but I don't think I can keep it up any more Nick! You just do trust me!" My heart started to break further into smaller and smaller pieces! I couldn't lose my Jess! "No Jess, stop saying that! I do trust you, it's just, you've been so…distant…" I stood there in front of a pink faced, hysterical Jess and despite the shouting and screaming, I still sounded so pathetic, but all I could think of was losing her and I didn't care how desperate I sounded. "I love you! I love you so much it hurts and I do trust you!"_

_"__Then why would you ask me that?", she interrupted, her voice like a knife cutting into me. _

_"__Because Jess…" I shouted, breathing in deeply, "You're too good for me! I don't deserve you at all! Your dad was right, I'm not good enough for you and it's not that I don't trust you; it's just that I'm scared! I'm scared that one day you'll wake up and question why you're with me and you'll leave! I can't lose you Jess! I can't…" I felt so stupid. I'd never cried in front of anyone before and I'd never looked so weak! __ "__See? You're doing it again! Listening to what other people think of us! I don't know Nick. Maybe it is time we call it. We're not a real couple are we? We're never alone and we argue all the time and…" Her voice trailed off. I couldn't believe Jess was saying that. Did she really mean it? "Jess, please, don't do this! We can get over this! We always argue and it doesn't change my feelings for you!" Jess suddenly cut in abruptly, making me freeze. "I know we always argue but we shouldn't! I don't know if we can make it...I love you, Nick, but-but what if that's not enough with you?" Her question hung in the air and I couldn't believe what was happening. The same thought kept swirling around in my head while she talked. I can't lose you! "I'm sorry…" she said after a while. I knew what was coming next and I couldn't stop it. "I'm not doing this with you anymore. I'm sorry!" She turned around and ran out of the loft, muffling her cries with her hand and slammed the door behind her._

Nick suddenly woke up, sweating and breathing heavily and looked at the luminous clock which read 3:02am. Why would he suddenly dream of that night? When they first broke up, it was all he could think about, but as time moved on and he got his job back and got his life back on track, he would dream of Jess laughing and smiling at him. He would dream about walking down the street together, arm in arm and talking about useless things. He would dream of kissing her cheek while she marked papers, before pulling back quickly and smiling as she looked at him, with that little frown on her face, before allowing the grin she had tried to hold back, break through. He loved that look she'd give him but for some reason, he thought of that night. He didn't want to think any more. He lay back down and looked over to the other side of his bed to see a beautiful woman sleeping beside him. She hadn't woken up at his sudden movement and was breathing lightly as she lay soundly under his covers, facing away from him. He smiled. "At least I have you" he thought as he relaxed and turned on his side. He breathed in, taking in her beautiful and unique smell as he pulled her closer to him. He pulled her as close as he could. He needed to know she was really there and he smiled again as her back pushed against his front and she curled up in his arms. He was so happy she was there but wished she was facing his direction so he could see her face and properly relax. As if she read his mind, she slowly turned around facing him, eyes still closed, and curled up into him, tucking her head into the crook of his neck. He wasn't sure if she was awake until she sweetly kissed his neck and sleepily said, "It was just a dream. I'm here," before sighing and falling back to sleep. She knew him so well and he couldn't help but smile.

"Goodnight Day"

**_To Be Continued…_**

**__****_A/N: _**

**_More chapters up soon. Thanks again guys! I feel like the story's moving quite slowly but I'll try to speed it up a bit more! Is it too repetitive or slow? Please let me know! Again I'm sorry if there are any of mistakes but I hope you enjoy it anyways! See ya!_**


	4. Well that was fun!

**_A/N:_**

**_Hello again! I'm really sorry guys, I was planning to upload a new chapter every day but I couldn't upload what I wrote on Friday and I went away for the weekend. Not far from home but I didn't have any wifi so no uploading for me! I'm sorry! Anyways I wanted to keep this chapter away from the break up so here ya go…chapter four!_**

**_-A_**

_He wasn't sure if she was awake until she sweetly kissed his neck and sleepily said, "It was just a dream. I'm here," before sighing and falling back to sleep. She knew him so well and he couldn't help but smile._

_"__Goodnight Day"_

Chapter 4: Well that was fun!

As Nick lay in bed after one of the happiest nights of his life and felt the early morning sun, trickle through his blinds, casting warm steams of light on his stomach, he stirred and slowly opened his eyes, still a little drowsy, as a huge grin spread across his sleepy face and the memories of last night filled his mind. The thought of seeing Jess lying beside him, hair fanned out on his pillow and eyes closed, sleeping soundly, made his heart flutter and his stomach do somersaults. He remembered her curled up into his body, her head resting against his broad chest as she said "It was just a dream. I'm here", before falling asleep and he wondered why he couldn't feel the light weight of her head on him. He stretched out his arm to the other side of the bed, his body following it as he turned over, and found his cold sheets bundled up, limp and lifeless and missing the body that once lay under them. Suddenly, despite the warmth of the sun, he felt cold and alone as he realised he was the only one in bed. His eyes shot open fully and he sat up quickly, looking over to confirm his fears of seeing an empty bed. Panic set in as he wracked his brain for some recollection of her leaving and he suddenly felt scared. "Maybe she wasn't even there", he thought. It wouldn't have been the first time for him to imagine a night with Jess, only to wake up alone, upset and disappointed as he realised it was just a dream. But that night was different from his dreams. It was real. He was sure! "That couldn't have been a dream, it felt so real! Last night was defiantly not a dream!" He closed his eyes and remembered everything that happened…

_"__I missed you too, Miller!" He loved it when she called him Miller. It would never fail to make his heart flutter and he sure did miss it over that year. They sat there at the bar, facing each other, knees touching and eyes locked as they talked. He couldn't believe she was there. He felt like a broken down record, but it couldn't help but feel like a dream to him and he couldn't stop thinking about how much he didn't want to wake up and lose her. He felt happy for the first time since she left and couldn't restrain his grinning face. They were still staring at each other after she said that, smiling like crazy, in a comfortable silence but the longer he looked at her, the harder it was getting for him to hold in the desire to kiss her. She was just so beautiful and perfect and he felt it a shame that he wasn't holding her in his arms and kissing her like he used to. They stayed like that for a bit until Nick couldn't hold it in and he placed his hand on hers, staring into her beautiful eyes and said, "I really missed you, Jessica." He said it differently this time; his voice was low, whispery and filled with unsaid emotions. Jess had caught on to his change in tone and the tension started to build up around them. His eyes went dark as he noticed hers go wide, at their sudden contact. She sat completely still, anticipating his next move and his eyes flashed down from her eyes to look at her plump lips. They were slightly parted and quivering and she was breathing heavier than before. He really wanted to lean in and crash his lips onto hers in a fit of passion but he didn't know for certain whether or not she really wanted that. She had left him, and although he didn't want to bring it up, especially in a moment like that, he still wanted to know exactly what he had done. Before, he wanted to know because his burning curiosity and bitter sadness was too overwhelming for him to take and he needed to know so he could, at least, heal himself, then he wanted to know so he could apologise and get her back but now that she was in front of him, he wanted to know so he could weigh up his options. If it was because of the arguments, then he would have leaned forward in a heartbeat. Hell, he probably would have gotten her back ages ago but if it was because of something else, something more serious, something she wasn't telling him, he would be a little bit more hesitant. He would want to sit and talk to her about everything and try to work things out before trying anything with her. He didn't want to make her feel uncomfortable and wouldn't want to upset her again but he didn't know why, so was torn between what to do. He didn't even know what the right thing to do was and his brain was working overtime, trying to decide as fast as he could. As he was too busy mentally battling his thoughts to make a decision, he hadn't realised that he was still staring at her lips, frowning slightly. "Nick?" Jess said, her voice just above a whisper. Nick's eyes shot up and had noticed her eyes had darkened and her cheeks were slightly flushed. He knew that look! He knew that tone! He thanked his lucky stars that he had the indescribable pleasure of being with Jess and getting to know her before this moment because he knew he would have over looked those signs if they had just met. In that moment, any and all uncertainties completely melted away and he knew that it would be a very stupid decision to ignore her signals. Without a moment's hesitation, he leaned in, not all the way but close enough for their noses to touch, and waited for Jess to respond. He knew she wanted him to continue but he wanted her to be the one to instigate it. He needed to be 100% sure. She stared at him, a little shocked at the sudden proximity, grounded in her seat. "Maybe not…" Nick thought, "Maybe I misread!" He started to move away glad, but still disappointed that he didn't cross a line and make things awkward, but as he moved back, Jess caught his neck and brought him in. To be honest, he was a little surprised, but his surprise quickly disappeared as her lips met his and the familiar fluttering and tingling feeling spread throughout his body. He was still holding back, scared she'd regret her decision but as she brought her second hand around his neck to pull him closer, Nick gave up on thinking and let his body take over. He wrapped his arms around her tiny waist like he had done so many times before, and stood up off the bar stool to get closer. She allowed him into her embrace as he deepened the kiss and they both breathed in sharply as the same thought ran through their minds simultaneously. They both wondered how something they had both done on numerous occasions before felt so brand new. They wondered why it made them both feel the electric buzz that made them twirly and go crazy. As he pushed closer he could feel her thighs start to tighten around his hips and he knew he had to stop it before he picked her up and pushed her onto the bar, losing control completely. Despite not wanting to lose the feeling of being pushed up against her, he pulled away and put his forehead against hers as their ragged breathing started to even out. She still had her eyes closed, but they opened when her breathing started to slow down. She looked into to his eyes, hers filled with lust and a hint of confusion over why he stopped and he couldn't stay there anymore. He took her hand from behind his head, leaving some money behind as he picked her up off the stool, making her breath hitch, and lead her out of the bar. She didn't refuse or hesitate as she followed him to the street and he managed to hail a taxi as soon as they stepped into the night. She was so engrossed in what was happening, she complete forgot about her car parked down the road. As the taxi pulled up, Nick opened the door for Jess and she giggled slightly at his attempt to stay gentlemanly after what happened and stepped into the car. He followed her in, telling the driver his address before closing the door to let him drive off. The ride home was silent and filled with sneaky glances at each other while they tried to keep a safe distance so they could keep their hands off each other. _

_The taxi pulled up outside the loft and they both stepped out after paying the driver. The taxi disappeared into the darkness and they were left alone. They looked at each other and both waited for the other to say something to break the silence. It was Nick that went first. "So..." he said dragging out the word and awkwardly smiling. "Do you want to...em...maybe come up? Not to do anything or to do something or you know, we could...or not, I don't know-" Nicks ramblings were interrupted as he found Jess pushing into him, kissing him deeply. Nick was taken aback again and wondered where Jess was getting her confidence from. When they first met, she couldn't bring herself to say penis and now she was throwing herself at him. But it wasn't cheap or meaningless, she filled her kisses with a romantic passion that filled every inch of his body with the warmth and pleasure that he couldn't resist. He wrapped his arms around her waist tightly for the second time in an attempt to get closer but as soon as he did, she pulled her face away and whispered, "I think we should go upstairs..." _

_Before he knew it, they were in apartment 4D tugging and pulling at each other's clothes as they made their way to his room. He didn't even think about his roommates but luckily for them, Schmidt was out of town for a work thing and Coach had tagged along, wanting to go out and get some girls and Winston had been spending a lot more time with Bertie, so wasn't in. Nick and Jess had pushed each other into his room and were now only half clothed. Jess was only in her new lingerie, black and lacy, and Nick had his shirt pulled off and his pants were making their way off quickly. As they fell on his bed, in a frenzy of kissing, Jess lying under Nick, he pulled away and looked down at the beautiful goddess now in his bed. He couldn't believe what was happening and didn't want to stop but he didn't want to push her into something she would later regret. He lifted his hand from her hip and gently rubbed her pink cheek with his flat thumb before looking deep into her eyes and saying gently, "Are you sure about this Jess? We don't have to do this if you don't want to...I don't want you to regret this later..." He really didn't want to stop but he knew it was the right thing to do. She looked at him sweetly; love and gratitude filling her eyes as she slowly brought her head up to meet his lips, kissing him gently. It was short and sweet but it was filled with love and care. She brought her head back down and said, "I would never regret doing this with you, Nick." She smiled and he felt like the luckiest man alive. He slowly let his lips fall onto hers and was amazed at how quickly they could go from lust-filled and hasty to romantic and passionate. It was beautiful and he was the happiest he'd ever been in their shared time of pure ecstasy. _

_They lay back smiling, glowing after what they had done as she slowly kissed him, before resting on him and saying, "Goodnight Miller". They both closed their eyes, feeling worn out but still excited and drifted off into a deep sleep. _

"That couldn't have been a dream...please say it wasn't a dream!" He got up, putting his boxers on and left his room to search for Jess. "Jess?", he called out, hoping for a response. He walked to the bathroom on the way through the loft and stuck his head through the open doorway, calling out for Jess again. Finding it empty, he continued to look for her. He walked into the front room and found it clean and missing her clothes from the night before. He let out a sad sigh and knew she must have regretted her decision and left before he woke up. He felt his bandaged, bruised heart sink and tried his hardest to keep his mind off the pain as he went into the bathroom to take a shower.

He stepped into the shower and immersed himself in hot water trying to keep his mind off the night he had with Jess. He was in the shower for fifteen minutes, washing away his disappointment and pain, before he heard movement in loft. He turned off the water, listening, and called out. After not getting a response, he grabbed his towel and wrapped it around his waist as he stepped out of the shower and into the living room. "Hello?", he called out, looking around, but when he couldn't see anyone, he instantly thought it was just his imagination. "Hello!" Nick jumped at the sound of an enthusiastic voice behind him and grabbed his towel, thinking that would save him from the intruder. He quickly spun around to find a cheerful Jess unpacking a brown paper bag and humming a little tune. He smiled widely at the beautiful sight in front of him as his heart warmed up. Jess was standing there wearing his shirt and a pair of his boxers that she'd pinned up with a bobby pin, ensuring they didn't fall down as she hummed and took out the unknown things. He felt so overwhelmed with happiness to see she was back with him in the loft they once shared and he felt like he could cry. He walked over to the kitchen and sat down smiling as he asked, "And where did you go so early in the morning Miss Day?" His voice was playful and sweet and it made Jess' heart sing as she responded. "Well, Mr Miller," she said spinning around, "I wouldn't say early in the morning, I did leave at ten." She smiled as he looked at the time seeing she'd only been gone for twenty minutes and she continued, "anyways, I got us breakfast" she said, grinning and picking up the coffee and muffins. He stood up and went to her wrapping his arms around her waist lightly and swaying slightly as he frowned and said, "You know we do own food, Jess. You didn't have to waste your money..." She slapped his bare chest playful and laughed as she said, "Hey! It's not wasting money if we eat it! And I didn't want to intrude! I don't live here anymore you know!" He felt a little sad when she said that and really missed her living with him but smiled as she pecked a small kiss on his cheek, turning away to put their breakfast on the kitchen table and sitting down, waiting for him to join her. He sat down and they started eating, smiling like giddy teenagers at each other. Nick took a big bite of the muffin and his mouth was filled with the sweet berry goodness that reminded him of Jess, washing it down perfectly with his of coffee. They continued to eat in silence, just enjoying their time together and finished their muffins in a matter of seconds. They were both starving after their busy night. They had moved back to their cups of coffee but Nick put his cup down and looked at Jess, a sly grin falling on his face. "Jess, did you wear my shirt and boxers to the store?" She looked down, embarrassed, and blushed as she swallowed the last mouthful of sweetly baked goods and looked up at Nick. "Erm...yeah. Sorry Nick, I put my dress in the laundry room and I needed something to wear…" Her voice trailed off as she looked at Nick. He felt so happy in that moment. It felt like they never broke up and he couldn't help but smile as she grinned at him. He completely forget himself as he said, "God I love you!"

_"__What did I just say?"_

**_To be continued..._**

**_A/N: _**

**_Hoped you like it guys and again, I'm sorry for making you wait. But, if you like it, don't worry because I did get to do some writing and planning while I was away and chapter five will be up as soon as possible! I also know what I want to write for chapters six and seven, but I won't get ahead of myself! Thank you guys for reading this so far and thank you for your patience! You're the best! I love you all! I hope there aren't any mistakes and if there's no "laundry room" in the loft, let's just pretend there is. See ya!_**


	5. What are we?

**_A/N:_**

**_Here's the fifth chapter guys, sorry I haven't uploaded in a while! I hope everything's ok and I hope you all like it! _**

**_-A_**

_He completely forget himself as he said, "God I love you!" _

_"__What did I just say?"_

Chapter 5: What are we?

Nick and Jess sat there with their empty breakfast wrappers on the table in front of them and stared at each other as Nick's words sank in. They were looking at each other for what felt like hours as Nick sat in a panic-stricken state and Jess sat motionless. He couldn't believe what he had just said! "I love you? Did I just say that out loud?" Nick thought to himself as he felt a moonwalk building up. "You idiot! Why would you say that? She's probably freaking out right now and thinking of running away again! You're so stupid! Way too soon, Nick! Way too soon!" While Nick was panicking and beating himself up again, on the other side of the table, Jess was still silent. "He loves me?" She thought, surprised he still loved her after what she did to him. "He loves me! Say something Jess! I demand you to say something!" She didn't know why, but she felt like her jaw had been bolted up and everything turned into stone disabling her from doing anything. She looked at him and saw the panic in his eyes and didn't want to leave him without a response again. Remembering her finger gun response the first time, she knew she had to tell him in that moment how she felt. "I-" she started, but before she could say the two more important words of the statement, the loft door swung opened and two figures walked through, fumbling with bags and arguing. "Schmidt!" Nick mouthed and Jess jumped up and quickly ran to the laundry room, unseen and unheard. She didn't know why she hid but it was an instant reflex that she couldn't help. Nick watched her run out and was initially upset that she was trying to hide them, but as soon as he saw his two roommates turn around, he was so glad she did. He really didn't want to explain anything to anyone just yet, especially Schmidt and Coach! Winston, maybe, eventually, but Schmidt and sometimes Coach weren't as open to his relationship or lack thereof, with Jess. It wasn't because they didn't like Jess, actually it was the opposite. Because they had all become friends, they all loved Jess and were also upset to find that she had suddenly left them.

_"Hey man," Schmidt said, walking into the living room, "where's Jess? We were gonna go to the bar." He hadn't noticed Nick was sitting on the couch with red eyes and a bottle of whiskey. Before he could catch on, Coach barged through the door, shouting. "Jessica! Where are you girl? We going to the bar or what?" _

_"You're going with Jess? I'm going with Jess!" Schmidt said, protectively and a little jealous! _

_"Yeah man! She invited me. Don't get so jealous!" _

_"I'm not jealous..." Schmidt was going to try to continue arguing but saw Nick and stopped instantly. Coach looked over too and stopped. "Nick...where's Jess?" Schmidt's voice was softer as if he knew what was coming. "She gone, Schmidty" Nick said frankly, drinking his whiskey. "Where, Nick?" Schmidt pressed. "I don't know. She left the loft a while ago..." There was silence for a bit before Nick added sadly, "She left me..." _

_"What? She's left you? I'm a child of divorce Nicholas! You can't just spring news like this on me!" Schmidt's voice was oddly serious as he shouted and left the room, slamming the door behind him and muttering something along the lines of, "not Jess!" and the loft dynamics. _

_"You ok, man?" Coach asked when Schmidt had left. "Yeah. Fine..." Nick said quietly, taking another gulp of whiskey as Coach nodded, concerned, and left, following after Schmidt to get him back. Nick was breaking down and if he wasn't as drunk, he probably would have argued back or at least felt a little more, but his emotions were slowly drowning in Jack Daniels. That's when Winston walked in and, straight away, saw him. He instantly knew what had happened and stayed with Nick for the whole night. Not talking or offering advice but just sitting there, drinking with him and listening to Nick's sudden outbursts before falling asleep. What Nick didn't know was Winston felt like something was missing and wanted Jess with them as well. _

After that, they searched everywhere for Jess, asking Cece relentlessly and random people, even outside Dave, but no one seemed to know. They loved Jess but because they didn't want Nick hurt by anyone, especially Jess, they were prepared to back Nick up no matter what.

That meant if they saw Jess, a massive argument would break out and wouldn't end well!

"Ugh! Coach, would you please move your luggage away from mine. It's leather and can't be touched by your rough bag."

"Shut up Schmidt! Please?!" Coach sounded drained and was actually begging him to stop talking. They were still pulling their bags into the loft, stopping when they got them into the living room and made their way to the kitchen where Nick was still sitting in his towel, trying to think of an excuse if it was needed. "Ugh, Nicholas, there you are! Didn't you get my text to pick us up?" Schmidt was on him as soon as he walked into the kitchen. "What? Oh, um, my phone's dead..." Nick wasn't really paying attention, he just prayed that Jess didn't make a sound and they didn't go into the laundry room. "Oh, of course! I can never rely on you! I knew we should have tried Winston!"

"I told you, he wouldn't leave his girlfriend!"

"Ugh! I wish Jess was here!" Schmidt said in response to Coach, forgetting Nick was in the room but instantly regretting it when he saw him.

"I'm sorry Nick." Schmidt said apologetically. "Nah, it's fine" Nick said, to his roommate's surprise. He was honestly not bothered by the remark. Before that night, a comment like that would have ruined his day and he would have moped around the loft until he stopped thinking about Jess enough that he could get up and go to work. But after the night and morning he'd spent with Jess, he couldn't care less. Despite the, 'I love you' slip up, Nick was still unbelievably happy Jess was with him and the smile had returned to his face as he thought about his beautiful girl waiting for him in the laundry room. He was still scared of losing her and even though he did love Jess more than anyone or anything, he was worried she'd freaked out and was thinking of leaving him on his own again! He knew it would be his fault! But still, the smiled stayed and both Schmidt and Coach had caught on and were a little suspicious until they realised that they had seen that face so many times before in the past, especially after being with Jess. "Ok Nick! Where is she?" Schmidt said with a knowing tone to his voice and a smile on his face. He was happy to see his friend smile after such a long time and wanted to meet the girl that had put it there. "Where's who?" Nick said, snapping out of his little trance as he started to panic_. "Oh God! Do they know?"_ He thought as his eyes widened. "Come on Nicholas! Don't be shy!" Nick's eyes were wide and scared like a deer in the headlights and he knew he was giving it away just by looking at them. Coach chimed in and said, "Yeah, dude, we already know someone's here. Just spill it! Who's the girl?"

"There's no girl!" Nick almost shouted as he got up and hurried to his room, hoping his roommates wouldn't see his sweaty back. He was still wearing his towel and hoped that would be enough for the time being. Schmidt and Coach watched Nick stand up and go to his room but ran after him, pushing him aside to get there first and hopefully catch, at least, a glimpse of Nick's partner in crime. Nick stumbled back, realising that the two idiots standing at his door thought she'd be in his room. They smiled triumphantly and pushed the door open to find an, although messy, completely empty room. Their smiles slid away as they walked in, hoping to find her hiding somewhere, but to their disappointment, it was empty and they watched as Nick walked in, a smug look on his face. _"__Thank God she ran to the laundry room instead of my room" _Nick thought. "Well then…" Nick began, "If you two idiots don't mind, I'd like to get changed!" His face was still smug as the duo walked out, shoulders slumped, mumbling something about not caring in the first place but as Nick went to close his door, he heard Schmidt say something about laundry and his eyes went wide as he ran out of his room and to Schmidt. "What did you say?" Nick said, panic building and grabbing Schmidt's shoulders. Schmidt turned around, a little shocked at his roommate's sudden hostile outburst. "What the hell is wrong with you Nicholas?" Schmidt squealed. "I just said I was going to do some laundry!"

"Laundry? Uh…" Nick knew he had to stop him but his mind was drawn a blank "You…you can't do laundry!"

"What? Why Nick? I know you are quite content with living in your own dirt but I personally like good hygiene and want to wash my clothes." Nick was trying hard to think of something that Schmidt would buy but all he could think of was Jesus, Jesus hawk on a speed boat, the environment, bears, famine, magic. His mind was filled with stupid reasons as to why Schmidt couldn't do his laundry. "Erm…I-I" His brain had turned to mush as he stuttered a response but he was panicking a lot and it just sounded like gibberish to a confused Schmidt. "What is with you Nick?" He asked. "Nothing it's just…" finally it clicked, "I'll do your laundry!" It was a long shot but it was better than saying bears had ran off with the washing machine before Jesus turned up to spin them into a vortex to another dimension. He was amazed that he could think of such elaborate lies that didn't make any sense but couldn't, for the life of him, think of a lie that would be believable. "You? Laundry? Schmidt's cold and surprised voice broke Nick out of his thoughts and Nick looked at him, hoping it would be enough for him to leave. "Pfft! Hahahaha! The day you do laundry, hell, the day you walk into the laundry room, will be the day pigs fly, a damp towel will be the best thing after a shower and I will be happy to let anyone, including you Nicholas, use my conditioner, my friend!" Nick knew he was a little useless when it came to these things but suddenly he wanted to prove him wrong. He didn't know why, maybe it was because he could rub it in his smug face or maybe it was to make himself a better man, which he wanted to do ever since he met Jess. He couldn't help it with Jess. He just always wanted to show her he could be good enough to have her. It was a little step, laundry, but he knew it would be a big deal to Jess and was a step in the right direction! "Anyway Nicholas," Schmidt continued, "I don't want your rough, cave man hands touching my clothes! They have to go through immense cleaning and I have a very important structure to my cleaning schedule and I do not want you messing with it!" Nick knew his roommates OCD tendencies but this was too much. "Now if you'll excuse me Nicholas…" Schmidt turned around and walked to his room to get his dirty laundry and left Nick to think about Schmidt's OCD and his plan to make himself better for Jess but returned almost instantly with a pile of neatly folded clothes which was Schmidt's dirty laundry. He walked passed Nick and he finally snapped out of his little trance, panic returning, and ran after him. He tried to grab him but he was too late and Schmidt opened door to find…an empty room. Nick looked, confused but relieved not to see a surprised and scared Jess standing there in his clothes. "Where the hell is she then?" Nick asked himself. He could have sworn he saw her go in there, but then where was she? He left Schmidt to his cleaning and went to get dressed, a confused look in his face. "Did I really imagine all of that?" He thought, as he got into his room closing the door behind him and picking up clothes from the floor to get dressed. "No. That couldn't have been a dream!" When he was done, he left the room and saw Schmidt had finished and was now making his way out of the loft with Coach. They didn't say where they were going and Nick couldn't be bothered to ask. He was still thinking about Jess' little disappearing act. The door closed as they shouted, "See ya, Nick" and he sat down thinking of where she could have gone. It was silent for a while until he heard shuffling and looked to the hallway. There was nothing there so he went back to his thoughts, but as he turned away a little head popped out of his doorway and whispered, "Pssst!" His head swung back around to find a cautious Jess looking around. "What the hell? " He thought, "Was she always in there?"

"Hey Nick," she whispered, "Is it safe?" Nicks wide eyes made her smile and he stared at her while saying, "Yeah…we're good!" He was still confused, wondering where she hid. She popped the rest of her body out of the doorway and walked to Nick, sighing in relief and sitting beside him. Watching his perfect girl smile and sit next to him, his original feelings of sadness of her running away to hide retuned and he wanted to know her reason why. He heard her sigh again as she slumped beside him on the couch and he himself let out a long breath he didn't even know he was holding in ever since he said I love you to Jess. He steadied himself as he began to talk. "Erm, Jess?" His voice was uncertain and lacked any confidence. She looked around to him, her inquisitive eyes focusing on his. He turned to avoid her gaze but failed because, who could resist those beautiful blues. She waited as they locked eyes and he took a deep breath. "Why I'm I so nervous?" he thought to himself. "Why is he so nervous?"

"Erm…why did you…erm…why did you hide Jess?" There it was. He put it out there and she realised why he was nervous. She had got to know Nick really well over the years and she knew he felt inadequate. She felt so stupid but most of all guilty. She ran away from him after he said he loved her and she knew she had to let him know how she felt before she lost her opportunity and lost him forever. It was only fair. But when she saw his patience slip away and anxiety take its place, she decided on answering his question first. "Oh" Jess said, "I, erm, I don't know…it was just like, uh, a reflex, you know?" He still had that look on his face and she could see he wasn't completely satisfied or convinced with her answer. She knew he needed more so continued, stuttering and tumbling over her words. She didn't know what he really wanted to hear and didn't know why she was so nervous. "I-I don't know, Nick" she repeated. "I think…it's just…ugh! I don't want to face everyone's judgment or answer other people's questions before we've even talked, you know? I just…" She sighed and looked at Nick's face which seemed to look a lot calmer and she knew he felt the same. When she saw his face she couldn't help but smile and he returned the smile, both relieved that they felt the same way. They chuckled as they looked at each other, all tension sliding away. Jess' cheeks were a little flushed and she grinned as she cleared her throat and asked, "Nick, what are we?" A question that should have sounded curious yet uncertain came out and was leaning more to the playful side. He smiled and knew he had to tell her. Not by accident, letting it slip out at the wrong time, but with purpose and meaning. "Are you sure you want to know, Jess?" She was a little confused with his response but said instantly, "Yes Nick!"

"To be honest Jess" he began nervously but keeping up a playful tone and a warm smile, "I don't know either!" They both laughed at his answer and when they finished giggling he continued, a little more tentatively this time. "But I do know that I-I wanna be with ya Jess…" Her eyes went wide when he said that. She couldn't believe what he was saying and the butterflies in her stomach went crazy. He stopped talking and watched her reaction. He was worried when he saw her eyes go wide but when a massive grin spread across her beautiful face, he knew he needed to continue to tell her everything. "I wanna be with you Jessica" he repeated, a little bit more confident this time, "I don't know what this is, but I do know I fell in love with you the moment you walked through the door and I haven't stopped loving you since!" Her face was full of surprise but her smile got even bigger as he talked, "I love you Jessica Day!" She let out a little laugh as warm tears built up in her eyes. "Nick…" she said, a little breathlessly. Now it was his time to go silent, waiting for her to respond to his declaration of love. He knew she was happy and knew she had missed him but didn't know if she_loved_ him anymore. He held his breath, anticipation building up. She looked away, now a little nervous, but when she heard him hold his breath, she looked back up and held his gaze. She shuffled closer, turning her body to look directly at him and his eyes went wide as she wrapped her arms around his neck. She grinned at his response to her touch and pulled him a little closer. He had turned his body to her by now and she was half sitting on his lap, half sitting on the couch. She took in a deep breath and he waited in anticipation. "I love you, too!" She finally said and let out a giggle as a smile appeared on his face. She took his gaze once again before throwing her head back and shouting, "I love you, Nick Miller!" He laughed and the warm feeling spread throughout his body at her familiar words. "She loves me!" he thought and couldn't hold it in any longer. He grabbed her waist and pulled her into a long but sweet kiss. She smiled under his lips and tightened her arms around his neck in an attempt to deepen the kiss. He almost gave into her but then remembered one small thing. He pulled away and threw her a suspicious look. "Jess, where were you hiding before?" He know she was in his room but he had no idea where. She giggled a response. "Well, I heard Schmidt wanted to do his laundry, so while you were stalling him, I ran into your room and hid in your closet. I guess I was well hidden because you didn't even see me…" She flashed him a sly grin as she saw his realisation. He looked at her as she bit her lip to stop a giggle. She was a sneaky one! "Oh really, Jessica? So you saw me come in but didn't reveal yourself? Now why would that be?" Jess looked at him through her long eye lashes, eyes hooded and darkened. His breath hitched. "Well…" she said, moving herself closer to fully sit on his lap, causing his eyes to widen. "I was going to, but then I would have missed the Miller show…" she smiled and giggled as his mouth fell open and his eyes went dark. She knew what he was thinking and waited for him to do something. "I see! Well I hardly think this is fair Miss Day! I didn't get any payment!" It was her turn for her mouth to drop open and he grinned, picking her up instantly. She squealed at the sudden movement and giggled as she wrapped her legs around his waist to stop her from falling, "Nick!" she laughed. "Put me down!" But it was too late for that. He was a man on a mission and he started to walk to his room, taking long strides, "Not a chance!" he said playfully. She giggled again as he pushed his door open and laid her on his bed, kissing her neck and collar bone and jaw lightly, causing her to laugh uncontrollable. He chuckled as he looked up at her and she breathed out a last giggle as he moved her bangs aside to kiss her smooth forehead. He saw her smile when drew back. He looked at her and said, "I love you Jess" She kissed his lips and let her head drop when they parted as she looked up at him and said, "I love you too Nick!"

"Okay" he thought. "No more talking" He pushed against her, and kissed her deeply, wrapping his arms around her waist as she arched her back to get closer while throwing her arms around his neck. "I'm the luckiest man ever!" he thought before letting his mind go blank to enjoy his time with Jess.

**_To be continued…_******

**_A/N: _**

**_New chapters up soon. Thank you all so much for your patience! I love you guys! _**


	6. Back to normal

**_A/N:_**

**_Hiya guys. Wow it's been a long time! I'm so sorry and I hate making excuses but school's just around the corner and I need to make sure all my assignments are completed before I go in. I'm sorry! Sixth chapter now…I hope it isn't getting boring and I'll try to speed things up. There's a little bit of Cece and Schmidt in this chapter. Not a lot but I couldn't help myself! By the way this is a loooonnnnggg one. I felt like I needed to make up for being away so long. Thank you so much for your patience and support, it honestly means a lot to me! Thank you guys!_**

**_-A_**

_"__I'm the luckiest man ever!" he thought before letting his mind go blank to enjoy his time with Jess._

Chapter 6: Back to normal…

They lay in bed, Jess resting on Nick's bare chest, her head just under his chin while his arms snaked around her small frame as he held her tightly, protectively, lovingly. She lay there, smiling at her head rising and falling with his breathing and listening to his loud but steady heartbeat, her arm on his stomach leading up to his chest where she mindlessly fiddled with the hair there. It was something she missed. Even though, most of the time she didn't even realise she was doing it, she still missed the feeling. But then again, maybe she just missed being close to Nick, cuddling up into him while he held her, making her feel loved. She felt so lucky to be able to hold him like that after so long and wished she could stay in that moment forever. Nick smiled, feeling the weight of her head on his chest, playing lightly with his chest hair. _"__She loves me!"_ The thought filled his mind and body as soon as she said it and he was still a little in shock but the feeling of pure, sincere bliss was coursing through his veins and had silenced any surprise he felt. In that moment he either forgot or didn't care why she had left him a year ago because she was with him now, lying on his chest and smiling at the memory of what they did only hours earlier. It was now twelve-thirteen and they had both woken up at the same time in silence and breathed each other in before Jess could feel Nick kissing the top of her head lightly, a smile on his lips and holding her tighter. Her smile widened and she looked up at him, pushing up and letting her lips find his. They held the sweet kiss for a few seconds before Jess pulled away and looked into Nick's eyes and shyly said, "Hi!" He smiled at her, pecking a quick kiss on her lips again before responding. "Hello there, beautiful."

"Beautiful? Well someone's in a good mood. Either that or your hallucinating!" She chuckled to herself as she blushed slightly at his compliment. She had never got used to people calling her pretty or beautiful. Her past boyfriends never really said those kinds of things and being best friends with a model never got her any compliments either. It had never bothered or even fazed her in the slightest, but after she moved in with three guys and met Nick, he would look at her and say things like, "Wow! You look great!" or "That's a nice looking dress, you look good in it" in his Chicagoan accent and her knees would feel weak. Even though they were still just friends when he said those things, it wouldn't stop her heart from going crazy and her breath from hitching. She wasn't a vain person, far from it, but she even remembered a time when he called her ridiculously hot. Even though they laughed it off like it was nothing, it was a surprise to her. No one had ever called her hot before. Schmidt did say she was "smoking hot" when she dressed up once but that was different. Firstly because she was trying really hard to impress and wasn't just trying to open a jar, she was still confused as to why he found that hot and secondly because it was Schmidt. She loved Schmidt but when Nick said it, it sounded better. More real and like he actually meant it but in a sincere and sweeter way, if that was even possible. Point is she still found it odd that someone, other than her parents, found her beautiful and never knew how to respond to the compliment. He looked at her with a more serious look on his face and took her hand in his. She instantly looked into his eyes again and stopped laughing. "Jess," he began, squeezing her hand slightly, "you are beautiful!" Her eyes widened as she heard the serious tone to his voice and knew he wasn't just saying it to make her feel good. He actually meant it. She chuckled nervously, wanting to shred the heavy atmosphere before anything happened. "He-hey, why so serious Mister?"

"Because I want you to know that I mean it. I know you don't see it, but you are the most beautiful person ever, Jessica! I wish you could see just how perfect you are in every way! You're beautiful and funny and smart and sexy and my life wasn't the same while you were gone." His absolute resoluteness and unwavering certainty was making her feel a little more than guilty. He was the sweetest and most loving man she had ever met and even after all the pain she had put him through, he was still so sure in thinking she was perfect. She loved him, but couldn't help thinking that if he thought she was perfect, he must be suffering from at least an acute head trauma. She really didn't want to leave Nick a year ago but she couldn't burden him with her problems. She loved him too much and even though it was the number one cliché, she knew because she loved him so much, she had to let him go. But now she was with him and she felt like such a horrible person for being so selfish. She felt like she was picking him up and dropping him at a moment's notice and didn't want it to look or feel like that! She didn't want him to go through that again! She didn't want to be like Caroline. Granted, her reason for leaving was better than Caroline's but that was beside the point. He saw tears prickle in her eyes but continued, "I don't know why you left me Jess but, ya know what? I don't want to know! I just want to be with you from now on, if you'll let me…" His voice was warm and loving with a hint of playfulness despite his serious eyes and she couldn't hold her burning tears in any longer, letting them silently slide down her cheeks with ease. He felt bad for making her cry and hoped they weren't tears of pain or hatred or, God forbid, guilt. He brought his hand up and gently wiped them away with his thumb, pushing them both up to sit on the bed. She looked at him and her response surprised him. "I'm so sorry!" she whispered. It was a whisper that was filled with guilt and pain and he couldn't understand why she was feeling like that. Had he said something stupid again? She looked down, away from him as more tears slid down her face. "Hey. Hey. What's wrong?" His nervous voice was still so soft but undeniably filled with concern as he spoke and his index finger curled under her chin, lifting her head to force her to look at him. "What are you apologising for?" It took a minute for her to respond but he waited patiently anyway. "I'm so so sorry…" she repeated again, choking slightly on her tears. "I never wanted to hurt you and I don't deserve you! You are willing to forgive me, no questions asked, and take me back and I don't deserve that. Not after the way I treated you! I not good enough for you…" Her tears continued to fall and her voice was breaking as she spoke. Nick couldn't believe what was happening and her voice broke his heart. The most perfect girl he could ever even dream of was sitting in front of him saying _she_ wasn't good enough for _him_. Him! Nick Miller. Sure, he liked to think of himself as an overall, nice guy but she spoke of him like he was some kind of saint. How could she think she wasn't good enough for him? She was amazing! "J-Jess…" he stammered breathlessly, taken aback by her words. No one had ever said anything like that to him. No one thought that they didn't deserve him and it was a surprise. He was always treated like the guy girls settled for or was the guy that attracted girls that were more than happy to lead him around by the ear, not letting him really be himself. He was the consolation prize and he completely understood why, so hearing those words come out of Jess' mouth was a shock. "Jess. Why would you think that? You're amazing! And I love you! Why would you suddenly think you weren't good enough for me? You perfect, Jessica!" He was in a strong state of disbelief and needed her to know that she was all he needed. "No…" she said quickly, cutting him off before he could say anything else. "No Nick! I'm not perfect! I'm not amazing and I'm defiantly not good enough for you! I'm- I'm…I'm just like Caroline!"

_"__What the hell?" _Nick thought. _"__Why would she say that? She is nothing like Caroline, in any way." _Caroline had crushed him to a pulp and sucked all the life out of him with the plan to purposely leave him a broken man. And when he was almost recovering, she'd managed to lure him back with apologise and promises before, inevitably, crushing him again. Jess was nothing at all like Caroline. She didn't leave him to hurt him. He was sure of that. After hearing the sound of her voice and the sound of her tears as she ran out of the loft a year ago, he knew she didn't want to hurt him and he knew it was hurting her. He loved Jess! "What the-Jess, why would you think that? You're nothing like Caroline! At all!" He seemed a little on the peeved side but Jess wasn't hearing any of it. "No Nick! I'm exactly like her! I left you and when I was feeling better, I went after you again! I love you so much and I would never, ever do that to you ever again but the fact that I did it once makes me and Caroline exactly the same!" He couldn't sit there and listen to Jess, his Jess, compare herself to the devil. "Jess…" he began in a slightly stern yet loving voice, but before he could say anything else her phone started to ring. It was arguably the worst timing for a phone call but she still lightly pushed herself from his embrace and shuffled over to her phone which was on Nick's bed side table and as she answered the phone, she wiped her tears away before clearing her throat and speaking. "Hello?"

"JESS!" Cece's concerned and, well a little too loud voice rang down her ear canal and attacked her ear drum mercilessly. "JESUS, FFUUUUUDDDGGE!" Jess' phone had been playing up a bit and would sometimes decide to flip to speaker phone. She had no idea why it did that, water damage maybe, but her mind was on other things and getting her phone fixed wasn't top priority. Cece, noticing Jess' sudden outburst, softened her voice before speaking again. "Sorry Jess. Is your phone still spontaneously flipping to speaker phone?" Jess rubbed her ear violently before answering. "Yes Cece! Usually it's fine and I don't react but you just screamed down my ear! What is wrong with you?"

"Sorry babe! I was just a little bit worried that's all. I told you to call me but you didn't and I got a little bit drunk and left with that guy I was telling you about. You know the one I met on the way to the bar?" Jess recalled the conversation and after recovering, she made herself comfortable next to Nick, mouthing an apology to him before speaking. It seemed like they were back to normal already. "Oh, right yeah…umm…" her voice trailed off as she looked at Nick, an expectant look in his eyes. He was so happy with Jess and wanted to tell everyone and scream it from the rooftops. He knew that if Jess told Cece, he'd be certain she wasn't embarrassed or ashamed of him or what they did. She shuffled about a bit, nervous, and went to stand up and walk out but Nick was being nosy and pulled her down, holding her hand. She threw him a confused look and he leant in and kissed her gently. He didn't want her to go and didn't know if she was okay after their chat. The kiss was a mixture of showing her he truly loved her, convincing her to not be scared of them together if she was and testing to see if she was okay. Feeling her respond to his kiss made his heart flutter uncontrollably and he smiled under her lips. "Hello?" Cece was still waiting and Nick's sudden kiss had thrown Jess off a bit. She pulled away, blushing and trying to hide the cute little grin making its way on her face, saying, "Oh yeah, sorry Ceec. Erm…I remember the guy. Are you okay? Are you…safe there? He's not a weirdo or…or anything, you know, unsafe?" Cece laughed at her friend and Nick watched her, smiling. He loved how cute she was and how she worried about the weirdest little things when it came down to the people she loved. "Yes Jess. I'm safe. He's not going to kill me if that's what you mean…" She chuckled again and Jess smiled, realising she did sound a little silly. She looked over at Nick, who was still looking at her smiling, and she took in a light breath before quickly kissing him. When she pulled back she saw the surprised yet relived look Nick's scruffy face held and giggled slightly as Nick wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her between his legs, allowing him to put his head on her shoulder and her back to press against his chest. He loved the feeling of holding her so close and she relaxed in his arms as Cece began to talk again. "Anyway, why didn't you call me?" Jess looked away from Nick and to her phone a little confused. "What? Why would I-ooooooohhhh…" She remembered that she should have called her when she got home but in her defence, she wasn't at home…"Yeah!" Cece sighed at her slightly ditsy friend. "Hey doesn't matter. How did things go last night?" Jess felt Nick's lips on her shoulder smile before he nuzzled his face into the crook of her neck before whispering quietly, "How _did_ it go Jessica?" She smiled, biting her lip trying to hold back a shy laugh. "Oh, you know…it was ok, I guess…" she said nonchalantly and Nick pulled away and looked at her in disbelief. She giggled, catching Cece's attention. "Hey. What's so funny? Jess? Are you with someone right now?" Cece's voice was playful as she teased Jess. Nick opened his mouth to talk but Jess put her hand to his lips to silence him, "What? Of course I'm not, it's just…" her voice trailed off and Cece was getting inpatient. "Jess!"

"Ok. Fine. It was a little better then ok." Nick smiled at her and put his head back down to his original position as he kissed her neck, pleased with himself. Jess giggled again and Cece pushed for more information. "Better then ok, huh? So I'm guessing you talked to him…" Cece waited for a response. "Something like that" was Jess' reply and Cece couldn't wait any longer. "Jess! What happened? Come on! I'm your best friend! I need details Jessica Day!" Nick tightened his grip around her waist, kissing her again before whispering, more quietly this time, "I'll go to the bathroom. You talk…" She smiled as he let her go and walked out, silently. "Ok fine. I saw him at the bar and went over to talk to him and, well, you know…one thing led to another and…" Her voice trailed off as she waited for Cece to cut in but she obviously wanted every single detail which she was not going to get, especially not over speaker phone, in Nick's bed, while he was in the other room. _"__Nope, not a chance!"_

"Oh come on, you don't want me to spell it out do ya?"

"Actually I do Jess, but maybe you can tell me later when your not in his bed!"

"What?! Wh-What are you talking about? I'm not-I am not in Nick's bed. Wha-pshh you're- you are-hey shut up!" She heard Cece laughing at her failed, flustered attempt to cover up the fact that she was with Nick. "Oh come on, little miss not-so-innocent! I know you honey and I can read you like a book. Not calling, the giggling, the silences every so often. Oh and the fact that Nick was talking to you…"

"You heard that?" Jess' voice was filled with surprised. _"__**Jeez**__she has ears like a bat!"_

"Yes honey. You two aren't the most discrete of people, you know!" They laughed at the truth in her statement. "Where is he anyways?"

"Oh, he went to the bathroom to let us talk."

"Ok, so what are we gonna do then? We were supposed to be coming home from our morning jog by now. You know we're going to be late if we don't leave soon?" Realisation struck Jess and reality dawned on her, her face dropping as she remembered what she had to do today. Cece had been sweet enough to promise to go along with her and they had planned to go for a jog before they left so they didn't feel stuffy and cooped up all day. _"__Looks like that plan's gone out of the window!" _Jess sighed, "Oh right. I forgot that was today…" Her voice was lower and a little disappointed. She just wanted to be with Nick, forgetting about the real life and all her problems. As soon as she said that, Nick was back, walking into the room and slumping back into the position he had moments earlier, grabbing her waist again lightly and kissing her shoulder. He had got back in to the obsession of pulling her into him every time he got the opportunity. Suddenly Jess felt a wave of nerves and actually fear wash over her and she knew she needed to change the subject before Cece could reveal anything. "Yeah hun, the hospital won't allow a reschedule you know."

"Cece!" Jess was completely tense and a little more than scared by now. How could she just blurt out about the hospital? She knew she was with Nick and on speaker phone! Nick lifted his head at the word hospital. _"__What? Hospital? What's going on?" _He looked at Jess, confused, as she yelled Cece's name to shut her up. "What? I was just reminding you that…" Jess needed her to stop talking. She felt Nick respond to their words and couldn't let her continue. She didn't want him overthinking anything and overreacting. "Well you don't have to, ok? I already know! Look I'll meet you there later. I've got to go!" She hung up immediately cutting off Cece's "Jess!"

Nick looked at her waiting for her to explain but she didn't allow her eyes to leave her phone. "Erm Jess…" he began, but before he could ask what the hell was going on, she was up, saying something about getting ready. _"__What is going on? Why are they talking about the hospital and why was Jess acting so weird? Could it be…maybe she…" _Nick cut off his thoughts. He didn't want to think anything stupid. Of course Jess was fine. What was he thinking? He got up after a couple of minutes to go to Jess. He found her in the bathroom, back in the dress she was wearing last night and running her fingers through her hair. She stopped when she saw his reflection in the mirror and let her hands drop, hoping he didn't ask anything but of course, he did. "Jess. What's this about the hospital? Are you ok?" She let out a nervous laugh before turning around to look at a concerned Nick. "Of course I am. Don't be silly Nick." Her response made him relax a bit but her voice wasn't very convincing. "Are you sure, Jess? You know you can talk to me. Why would Cece…"

"Don't listen to Cece. I'm fine! Okay?" He still didn't seem convinced so she continued, sighing. "Cece and I were going to meet up with Sadie at the hospital and have a girlie day out together with her little girl. You know, just have a little harmless fun. We've been waiting for her to have some time off for a while and if we're late, the hospital won't let her reschedule and take another day off. She's too busy for that. Cece was just reminding me not to be late." Jess was amazed with herself. She hated lying to Nick but technically it wasn't actually a lie. She was just not telling him everything! Nick's face turned into a smile as he sighed out in relief. _"__Thank God!"_ he thought. "_Stupid imagination!" _He walked closer, to a still tense Jess and rubbed her arms. "Ok. Sorry. I'm just a little crazy." He laughed at himself and smiled again as he felt her finally relax completely in his hands. She moved forward and kissed him sweetly. "Hey. Wait for me though" he said when they pulled back. "Why?" she asked, curious. "I'll drop you off at Cece's. You can't exactly go on a fun play date all dolled up, can you beautiful?" There it was again. That word. Beautiful. This time she just smiled at him and responded. "Why thank you. That would actually be really helpful," She held his gaze before adding, "Handsome!" She winked and turned around to continue on her knotted hair as his childish grin grew before he ran out to get changed. 

They reached Cece's place in exactly ten minutes, holding hands for the majority of the journey, and as they got there, they saw her just reaching her apartment. Nick honked his horn to get her attention as he pulled up and Cece turned around instantly, eyes wide, but relaxed when she saw who it was and smiled as she waved. She was so happy to see them together again. They were perfect for each other and she knew more than anyone how much Jess needed him over the past year. Cece was always against her decision but Jess was stubborn and set in her ways, thinking it was for the best but constantly regretted her actions, wanting someone closer than Cece to hold when she was in pain. Cece loved Jess and knew Jess felt the same, after all they had been friends since they were kids, sharing so many memories and had become like sisters, but she could see that she needed more. Despite her genuine gratitude for all Cece had done for her, standing by her and doing as she asked to keep them safe, Cece could see she needed more than a friend, more than a sister. She needed Nick. So after all of that, seeing them sit facing each other in the car, saying a quick goodbye and smiling was all Cece could ask for. She was so happy and couldn't hold back her smile as she witnessed Nicks look before Jess went to leave. He looked like he never wanted to see the back of her again and before she could open the door and held her arm back, grabbing her attention and turning her around before pulling her into a kiss. It was so sweet and Cece actually felt a tear in her eye. She felt stupid, but seeing it, she knew how much Nick loved Jess. He had no idea what Jess had to fight while they weren't together and had no idea that such a small gesture would mean so much to Jess. After he raised his hand to cup her cheek, he rubbed her face with his thumb and pulled away unwillingly. Cece saw Jess push her face into his hand as her hand went up over his and saw the smiles on their faces. But when she really looked at Jess, she saw the look in her eyes, which she knew Nick was oblivious to as he didn't know what they knew. She saw the sadness and regret and her own heart started to break. She needed Jess to be ok. After that, Jess said something and quickly kissed Nick's cheek before turning back and leaving. On her way out and to Cece, she looked back a smiled, mouthing "I love you" and waving goodbye before turning to her friend, hopefully hiding the tears in her eyes. As Nick read her lips, his heart started beating even harder in his chest as he smiled and sighed, wishing she would stay with him forever. He felt so stupid, like a sixteen year old again, all _giddy_, as Jess would say, over a crush, but with Jess he didn't care. He saw her go to Cece and watched as her friends arm went around her shoulder. He didn't see anything strange with that until he looked at Cece's face. The look it held worried him. It was filled with sadness and concern and her eyes were glassier than before. As her arm went on Jess' shoulders she moved her face closer before holding her a little tighter and looking up at Nick. She could see he looked a little confused and worried so put on her best it's-fine-don't-worry smiles before giving him a quick wave goodbye and leading Jess into her apartment block. She knew he'd forget about it eventually, she was pretty damn convincing when she wanted to be. And she was right. When he saw Cece's warm smile and wave, he put everything down to his over active imagination and sighed again, hoping he was right as he pulled away and reluctantly drove back to the loft, feeling a little colder now that there wasn't a particular beautiful brunette with big blue eyes sitting next to him, holding his hand and looking out the window, humming sweetly. He offered to take the girls to the hospital and even be their chauffeur for the day but she declined, giving him a grateful smile and a kiss on the cheek, saying she thought it would be better to walk there to stretch their legs, seeing that they had missed their morning jog. He understood and let her enjoy her girlie day with her friends. If he knew what they were going to do before going out, he would have been a lot more insisting.

As Cece lead Jess inside, unlocking the door and letting them in, Jess felt safe enough to let the tears slide down her cheeks. After what she had been through over the year, she had gotten a lot stronger but when things came down to Nick, she couldn't help but let the tears fall. The difference now, however, was she was able to control the volume of her crying and was able to hold her tears back for a lot longer, giving her more time to cover up her feelings. It's not the best or healthiest trait, being able to bottle up her emotions, but she hated to worry Nick so looked on her new found skill as a gift, if you will. However, as Cece had said before, she _could_ read her like a book and knew before she even reached her, that she was hurting. But being the amazing friend she was, she reassured Nick with a smile and lead Jess upstairs, holding her upright, so she wouldn't break down completely in front of him.

Cece turned around letting Jess go and closed the door but when she looked back to see her best friend's glassy blue eyes, she couldn't help but let the tears return. She moved forward instantly and hugged her tightly. "I know! Don't worry! You'll be fine and it won't be too long until you can get back and be with Nick! I promise you everything will be fine and it will all go back to normal again! Okay? I promise!" Her voice was soothing and Jess felt so touched. Cece wasn't a crier or much of a hugger but, like Jess, she had changed slightly after everything that happened. Even though it was Jess going through it, Cece felt everything she did and took it so hard. She had always stayed strong in front of Jess but when she was alone, she wouldn't be able to hold up a front anymore and would break down. Jess didn't deserve any of what happened but they pushed through, together, hand in hand, and made it out ok, together, hand in hand and stronger than ever. Cece let her friend go and they both wiped away their tears. Jess took in a deep breath and smiled. She had done it again. Cece had actually made everything ok again just by doing the most simplest of thing, hugging her and telling her everything would be fine. If anyone else would have done that, she wouldn't have listened because it was just a hug but when Cece did it, she calmed down completely and realised how right she was and how much she was overreacting. She was going to fine and back in Nick's arms in a matter of hours. "You're right! You are always right! Thank you so much Cece!" They smiled at each before taking in a refreshing breath. "Ok! Let's do this!" Jess had a new found confidence and couldn't wait to get back and see the man she loved. Nick Miller.

When Nick had got back to the loft he was greeted by his three male roommate's smiling and shouting, "Hey Nick! You're back!" enthusiastically, patting him on the back and leading to the couch. Nick was taken aback by this sudden warm greeting and couldn't be bothered with it. All he wanted to do was sit on the couch alone and watch TV while he tried to pass the time in waiting for Jess to call. After she declined his offer of driving her around, they both settled on him picking her up at Cece's to spend more time together. Before she left, she told him she'd call him as soon as they were finished and kissed him goodbye. He knew he was going to see her again but not seeing her with him on the couch, cuddled up into him honestly made his heart ache. He missed her so much! So much! He missed her beautiful face light up into a smile when she looked at him. He missed the feel of her soft lips under his. He missed the feel of her smooth skin under his coarse hands. He missed the sound of her voice both talking and singing and he missed the sound of her warm bubbly laugh. He missed her so much and did feel a little clingy but he didn't care. He needed her because it was paining him so much not to have her close. But there he was, being pushed into their shared leather sofa while his weird friends surrounded him with huge, almost frightening, smiles plastered on their faces. "So Nick…" Schmidt began, "Where have you been? Had prier engagements to take care of or just decided to go on a spontaneous early morning walk?" His voice was filled with a teasing suspicion and before Nick could answer him, pointing out that it was now just passed half-passed twelve, Winston started talking, asking him questions as well. "Yeah, Nick. Where d'ya go, man? Bit early for you to go out, isn't it? Usually you're just getting up around now…did you get up and go out for a particular reason?" Nick was trying to interject and answer their continual questions but they wouldn't allow him to. "Or a particular person maybe? You know, a friend? An acquaintance? A lover?" It was Coach's turn now and they were all snickering like idiots especially when he said "lover", breaking up the word, teasing him. "For God's sake you're all as dumb as it gets!" Nick couldn't be bothered to deal with them. He was thinking about a lot and if he took a second to sit back and look at the scene before him, he would have seen straight away that they obviously knew, but right now he was completely off track and annoyed at his idiot friends. "What's wrong, Nicky? Don't you want to share with your friends? You seem to be avoiding our questions, buddy…" Schmidt's annoying voice was getting on Nick's last nerve and when they all started chuckling and giggling like a bunch of pre-teen school girls, Nick had had enough. "You're all idiots. If you'd give me a second to answer your damn questions, you'd know that I was out with…"

"JJJeeeeessssssssssss?!" Schmidt cut in, singing her name and they all laughed again. Nick felt like he was defiantly missing something. Had they all been out morning drinking or had they all given away copious amounts of blood to hospital because if not, they all deserved a punch in the face. They were so infuriating. He got up, wanting to leave, but after hearing their voices, it hit him. _"__Oh I see…"_ he thought to himself, feeling a little stupid for not seeing it straight away. Schmidt and Winston, who were still sitting on the couch, either side of the gap where Nick sat, both grabbed an arm and forced him down and Coach's hands went over his shoulders to stop him from getting up and leaving before admitting being with Jess. "What-What is wrong with you idiots today?" Nick asked struggling in their grasp. He eventually gave up and slumped further into his seat. "Fine!" he said, giving in, "I was with Jess." Despite their giggling and stupidity, Nick thought that when he actually admitted it, they would shout out him telling him it was a mistake like they had when he was with Caroline. Like he said to Jess before, he didn't agree with her at all and didn't think what she did was anything like what Caroline had done, but he didn't know what the guys were going to say. He thought they'd be against it because of the way they acted when they broke up but to his pleasant surprise, he couldn't have been more wrong. They all let go of him laughing, cheering and whooping, all of them high-fiving and patting Nick on the back, congratulating him. He was amazed at how much noise only three people could make. "Wait, what?" Nick's confusion did quieten them down a bit but not completely. "You're all ok with it?"

"Why wouldn't we be?" Winston asked. "We all love Jess, man! You were best with her!" They all nodded in agreement, still smiling like maniacs. "Yeah, and you know…" Coach began, "Now we know she's back, we get to see her again!"

"Here here!" Schmidt said in agreement and they burst out into laughter again. "_Wow!" _he thought. He forgot how much Jess meant to the guys and smiled at them. Yes, they were idiots, but they all loved Jess and were lovable idiots. "Oh I see! So you don't care about us together, you just care about Jess? Soon I'll be pushed out of the picture, will I?" he was teasing them now and chuckled under his breath but his cockiness to get back at them backfired when they all simultaneously said "Yes!" and started laughing again. Yep defiantly idiots!

Eight hours later, and Jess had finally called Nick. Nick was so bored while she was gone. He did speak to the guys about them two, acting like teenage girls over the whole thing, asking questions like, "So how did it happen?" and "What was she wearing?" He thought it was hilarious and was actually happy to answer their stupid questions, telling them about the amazing night and morning they had shared, but when Schmidt inevitably turned the conversation to more inappropriate questions, Nick got a little angry and stopped their little girls talk there. Coach and Winston immediately groaned and slapped Schmidt because they all wanted to know how Jess was. They all missed Jess for lots of reasons, some shared and others more personal. Winston missed the little chats they had. Even though he was the last of the group to meet Jess and was a little uncertain at the first encounter, they had instantly got close and he would always give her inspirational chats as well as stupid little chats about things they both found hilarious like, cats in hats and bow ties or onesie pyjamas. Coach missed laughing about the weirdest stuff with her. Even though he liked to think of himself as a hard nut and a bit of a tough guy, he was honestly the softest guy around and always felt like a child when he was with Jess. It was silly stuff like baby pigeons and glaucoma glasses but he missed her all the same. Schmidt just missed everything Jess. He missed her innocence and quirkiness and would do anything to see her cook a frittata in a sauce pan again. They all missed her but none more than Nick, so when she called him, he was so excited and felt like he could breathe again. "Hey Jess. I missed ya." He smiled as he heard her response. "Aww. Hi Nick. I missed you too. Sorry it took so long. We weren't planning on spending the whole day out but we went to that old arcade and messed about before picking up Sadie's daughter and going to the zoo. I don't know why the zoo but I have to admit, I love the zoo." Nick loved listening to Jess talk and could listen about her day for hours without ever getting bored. Yet another thing he missed when she was gone. He laughed as she explained her love for the zoo and everything that happened, sounding like an excited little girl going there for the first time. She continued before cutting herself off, realising just how long she was talking for, "Wow, sorry Nick!" she said with a giggle. "No complaints here Jess!" he said, returning with a chuckle. There was silence for a bit while they both smiled before Nick remembered the plans he'd made. "Oh, hey, Jess do you wanna come down to the bar? I know it's not the best place but we're all getting down there for nine and we could catch up. What d'ya say?" He was really hoping she said yes. Even though he wanted to spend alone time with Jess, the guys insisted on meeting at the bar to see her again and he felt bad saying no and he was happy just to see her. "Erm…yeah sure, why not? But just to clarify, when you say 'we're all going', who does that include?" She knew who he meant, but she didn't want to set herself up for disappointment. Even though she missed Nick the most, she couldn't deny just how much she truly missed her three guys and wanted to see them so badly. It wasn't the most opportune time when they walked in, that morning, but now she was more than happy to see them. "Schmidt, Winston and Coach." Nick said, uncertain of what her reply would be. "Is that ok?" How he hoped it would be ok. "Are you kidding me," she said, barley containing her excitement. "That's more than ok! I've missed them so much! I can't wait to see them!" She was so happy at the thought of seeing them again, that she almost forgot that her and Nick had planned alone time. "Oh sorry Nick" Nick knew instantly what she meant. "It's fine. Really! I'm happy you're just as excited to see them as they are to see you! They've really missed you Jess!" Jess' smile began to grow at his words. _"__They missed me? They don't hate me?" _She thought, like Nick, that after what she did they would be at least a little against her. "Really?" she asked. "Are you kiddin' Jess? Of course they missed you. They kept telling me how happy they were for us but then they went on and on about everything they missed about you, your quirkiness, your little chats, you cooking…they really miss you Jess. They love you!" Jess let out a breathy laugh as tears welled up in her eyes. She missed them a lot and was so happy they didn't hate her. "Okay!" She said looking over at an impatient Cece. "I'll meet you all there at nine. You don't need to worry about picking me up, k?" She couldn't wait to tell Cece so they could get ready and go. She wanted Cece to be there as well. She was also part of their odd little family and Jess knew she missed them. Especially Schmidt. "Are you sure, Jess. You know I'm more than happy to get you?" Jess laughed again. "Yes, don't worry about me. I'll see you there. I love you." Nick felt the warmth he'd missed for so long, spread throughout his body and his heart beat against his chest unbearably hard. He smiled too. "Okay. See ya there. Love you too." She hung up with a smile on her face and butterflies in her stomach and turned to Cece, telling her to get ready to go out. Nick put his phone in his pocket as Schmidt walked into the living room from his room. "Aww. Isn't that just adorable? Nick's in love!" his voice should have sounded sarcastic, or so Nick thought, but it wasn't. Coach and Winston both walked in and looked at Nick. "When are we meeting her?" Winston asked. "Nine." Nick replied before going to his room to make sure he was ready.

It had been twenty minutes and the two girls were already ready to leave. Hair done perfectly, wearing dresses that suited them both fittingly and make up done to perfection. They smiled at each other, unable to contain themselves as they left. Jess texted Nick on the way to the bar walking with Cece, side by side.

"Hey, we're making our way to the bar. See ya in a bit. X"

"K. We just got here. Are you with Cece? X"

"Yeah. She'd never admit it but she misses everyone as well. Especially Schmidt."

"I know! Well I'll order you a pink wine. What does Cece want? X" Jess smiled at his last text. Pink wine! She loved him so much! She asked Cece want she wanted and returned to her phone. "Thank you Miller. You know me so well. Nothing strong for Cece, just a beer. Thanks again Nick. I love you. X" Now it was Nick's time to smile. He loved hearing, or reading-in this case, that she loved him. "No problem Day. See ya in a bit. I love you too! X"

When Jess and Cece walk into the bar, the guys turned around and saw them. Jess was wearing a dress, obviously, and she looked amazing. It was so Jess and it reminded Nick of the first time she wore it, him being Julius Pepperwood from Chicago. The top half was a vivid blue V-neck that brought out her beautiful blues, which were now sparkling under her black frames, and the bottom half was a white skirt with little Russian dolls on them, a blue trim around the hem and bow at the side, pulling the dress in at the waist and setting it off, make it look even more Jess. She wore little black ballerina pumps and had a little purse hanging off her shoulder from a long chain. Her hair was tied up by the hair at her temples and her bangs fell over her forehead. Her raven like curls cascading down was pulled over her shoulders and rested over her chest. She didn't were a lot of makeup, a little bit of black eyeliner and mascara and a little bit of pink lipstick, bringing out the natural blush to her cheeks. Other than that she didn't wear make-up, not like all those other girls that would cake their face in makeup, changing and contouring. Nick preferred it when girls stayed further away from makeup, especially Jess as he liked to see her pale porcelain skin, a beautiful sight. She was so beautiful and Nick caught his breath when he saw her. Cece was beside her when walking in and although looked beautiful and wore clothes that suited her perfectly, she was completely different to Jess. She wore a plain black dress with a scooped neck and cuffed sleeves sitting on her shoulders. It was a simple dress but because she was so beautiful and wore it with such confidence, it was all she needed. She didn't need a mass amount of jewellery or accessories. She just needed the dress. Unlike Jess, she wore black heels which made her long legs appear even longer and her thick, silky hair was only lightly curled at the ends as it fell over her shoulders. Her bangs also fell over her forehead, framing her face and her eyes were made up with slightly thicker eyeliner and long lashes that fluttered and made her big dark eyes appear bigger and darker. Her dark skin with flawless and it was obvious she was a model. As they walked in, Jess' eyes shot straight towards the bar where four men, swivelling their heads over their shoulders to look at the two beauties that had just walked in, sat and her eyes met a very pleased Nick. She smiled and looked up to Cece seeing her look at Schmidt and then away. She missed him but Jess knew it would still always be a little bit hard for Cece. She looked at Schmidt, who was looking in utter amazement at Cece and watched as the smile on his face turned down when Cece looked away. He looked a little bit defeated and turned away, facing the bottles on the bar. Jess then looked at Winston and Coach who were smiling like mad men and she couldn't hold back her growing smile. She took Cece's hand gently and gave her a you-can-do-this smile before slowly leading her to the bar. It was just a little busy and as soon as they walked in ever man in the bar turned and stared at them. Half way from the door to the bar, two men in their late twenties-early thirties, moved from their seats at the bar and walked up to Jess and Cece, cocky and confident. Nick and Schmidt saw them making their way to the two beautiful girls and took an instant disliking. They stopped in their tracks when the two guys walked in front of them. The more tanned, muscly and obviously more cocky one started talking first. He looked Cece up and down and smiled. "Hey, good looking. I saw you checking me out. How about you buy me a drink?" He was so cocky it was unbelievable! Did he actually think that would work on anyone, let alone Cece. "Excuse me?!" Her disgusted reaction shocked him at first but he laughed smugly as he spoke, "Fine. Tight on cash? Don't you worry, I guess I'll buy you one. Lucky for you, I'm loaded!" He sound like an idiot and Jess wanted to slap him around the head, button up his shirt and tell him to act his age. That's when the other guy stepped in. He looked different from his idiot friend. He was paler and not as muscly and looked at lot less cocky and a lot more nervous. As soon as his friend started talking he winced at his arrogance. "Urm…I'm sorry! He can be a douche sometimes…" He was looking up at Cece timidly as her anger built up and she tried to control herself from punching him square in the face. He then turned to Jess and his eyes lit up. Jess could see that he was the nicer guy and didn't mind talking to him. "Hi, um, I'm Tim. It's nice to meet you. Could you and your friend forgive us and join us for a drink, maybe?" He was clearly nervous and Jess felt bad for the guy. Sure he was good looking but she had the best guy ever. He was good looking and funny and her own little grumpy, turtle-faced mystery and right now he was drinking his beer, before putting it down to get up and stop the two guys from making a fool of themselves. Both him and Schmidt got up started to walk over. Jess looked at Tim and, in her nicest way, turned him down. "That would be nice, er, Tim?" he nodded so she continued, "But you see, I'm meeting my boyfriend and some friends here and I feel like if we stay any longer my friend won't be able to hold back and will end up punching your friend in the face." At the mention of the word "boyfriend" his little face dropped but he chuckled at the thought of such a beautiful woman punching anyone. But when he looked up at Cece, her jaw was shut tight and her eyes were wide and serious as she nodded. He knew they were serious. "Really?" he asked just to make sure but as soon as he said that, two shadows fell over them and a big hand went down, heavily, on his little shoulder. Tim jumped and he and his friend, Dirk, slowly turned around to see two tall men standing in front of them. One was quite stocky and he looked like he could take a guy down in one hit. He was wear a flannel shirt and jeans and he had one day scruff on his face which only made him look scarier, especially when he was staring down at tiny Tim. Jess and Cece knew that Nick could make himself look bigger and tougher if he needed to and would defiantly throw a punch, but only if he needed to; he had made that clear with Artie, the coffee shop owner, but they both knew he was just grumpy Nick Miller who was being a little jealous and protective and they smiled at his towering demeanour. The two, now quite scared, men then both look over at Schmidt who was although clean shaven with slick hair and in a suit, had also made himself look just as tough as Nick, staring down at them. "Really." Nick said, low and threateningly, answering his question. "Why don't you two just run along now?" His voice was very threatening even though he hardly even said anything and Jess smiled. Tim instantly backed away, confused as to why such a small sweet girl was with such a scary looking guy and apologised to the man towering over him but Dirk thought he could try it on. He scoffed and turned to Cece, "Well you don't have a boyfriend, do you? Looks like I can have you then!" Schmidt's face turned into a look Jess and Cece had never seen before, pure hated. He tapped Dirk on the shoulder and when he turned around, punched him in the face. Dirk instantly grabbed his swelling eye. He let a quite a feminine squeal and a few curses before walking off, like a scared little puppy, say something about a big mistake. Jess and Cece, hell even Nick, was in a state of shock. If anyone was going to hit someone the two women standing in front of them and the two men at the bar would have put money down on Nick. But to everyone's surprise, even to his own surprise, it wasn't Nick, but Schmidt that had thrown the punch. He wasn't going to stand there and let someone talk to Cece like that. He, as did everyone that knew her, knew she was very capable in looking after herself and didn't need anyone to sweep in and help her. She actually preferred if they didn't. So when Schmidt had done that, a load of different emotions buzzed in Cece's head. At first, it was initially shock, then it was humiliation, thinking it looked like she needed saving, then it was sadness as she thought of how Schmidt was when they were together, always putting her first and loving her more than anyone she'd ever met, excluding Jess. But finally her mind settled on something that shocked her even more than what Schmidt had done. She was grateful and happy that he had done that and she hoped it was a good sign. A sign that showed he still cared about her. A sign that showed he still…loved her.

As soon as Schmidt hit Dirk, Winston and Coach shouted in surprise at him. "OOOOHHH! Damn! Schmidty!" They were laughing at getting to witness it, a once in a lifetime opportunity, but Schmidt couldn't hear them. He just stared at Cece, trying to work out what she was thinking. He still cared about her and still loved her and he hoped she wouldn't be mad at him. Finally her eyes met his and she asked quietly, "Why did you do that?" Seeing Cece sent Schmidt's heart beating hard and suddenly he didn't want lose her. "I'm sorry Cece! I just couldn't have him talk to you like that!" His head dropped and he knew she'd be upset for embarrassing her. By now it was only them standing alone. Nick had pulled Jess aside to talk to her and the rest of the bar had gone back to what they were doing. Cece looked around and seeing that no one was looking, slowly brought her hand down to pick his up. She picked up the hand he hit with and pushed her lips to his knuckles. At the first whisper of a touch, Schmidt's head shot up and watched, wide eyed, as she kissed his bruising knuckles. He took in a breath as she did and when she put his hand down, not letting go of it, she looked him in the eyes and whispered a sincere, "Thank you!" It was surprising to Schmidt and he was rooted to his spot as she smiled and slowly let go of his hand and walked over to Jess to talk to her.

Nick and Jess were smiling about something. He had pulled her to the side, taking advantage of the situation to ask her if he did anything. "Nick, I promise the smaller one was a lot nicer and apologised for his friend. He was just being nice."

"Nice?" Nick said, a little jealous. "He wanted to buy you a drink, Jess. That meant he wanted to get you drunk so he could try to get into your panties!"

"Nick!" She hated that Nick thought the worst of people and trusted no one, but she also loved it. He took care of her no matter what and made it clear that, despite his friends, she was the only person he really trusted. "What? It's true. I mean, look at you Jess. You're the prettiest girl in the damn bar!" She smiled. "Aww!" She couldn't help but react. It was so sweet and reminded them both of Mexico. They both went silent after Nick sighed and Jess took his hand. "Ok. You're right. I'm sorry!" He looked up at her and she smiled. "But you don't have to worry," she said, continuing as she wrapped her arms around his neck, "Why would I agree to drink with him, when I've got a handsome bartender boyfriend waiting for me?" He smiled. They hadn't had the "girlfriend/boyfriend" discussion yet but the moment he saw her he really wanted to hear her call him her boyfriend again. He thanked the Gods because he was lucky to hear it twice in one night. "Boyfriend, hey?" He said playfully as he pulled her in tighter, his arms around her waist. She blushed, remembering that they hadn't actually got any time to talk about them and she felt anxious for jumping the gun. But when his arms went around her waist and he playfully teased her, she knew he was okay with it. "Well…only if you want to be" she said with the same amount of playfulness, moving closer to his face. He looked in her eyes and then flashed down to look at her plump pink lips, curled up into a sly smile. He returned back to her eyes before saying, "Oh, I definitely want to be." He smiled and added "Girlfriend!" She giggled at his response, blushing again and closing the gap between them. It was a tender kiss but it was filled with passion and love. When she pulled back she smiled and placed her forehead on his before saying, "That's a relief" and giggled as he laughed at her. Jess dropped of her tiptoes and to her normal height just as Cece came over. "Erm Jess, I'm sorry to interrupt but could I talk to you for a second, alone?" Jess knew what it was about and threw Nick an apologetic look before leaving with Cece. Nick watched them walk into the ladies room and walked to the bar where Schmidt now was smiling and getting congratulated while he inspected his fist.

As soon as they got into the bathroom, Cece started rambling. "Oh my God, Jess what am I gonna do? I like him. I like him a lot. But it's Schmidt and I should be over him and I thought I was. I mean sure I missed him, but I missed the other guys too and I didn't think about it but when I saw him, all these feelings rushed back and then he protected me and I couldn't help but feel thankful and usually I hate it when people do that and I kissed his hand and thanked him and he smiled and I'm freaking out." She continued to talk before Jess cut in. "Hey. Hey slow your horses. Take it easy Cece, it's not like he proposed to you. Just calm down and think about it. You said you like him, right? Are we talking as a friend of more than that?"

"Oh I don't know Jess, it's just…" her voice was still high and frantic and Jess had to stop her again. "Cece. Calm down and just think about it. Take your time." Jess' voice was soothing and gentle and Cece obeyed, taking in a deep breath and thinking about it. Did she like him as more than a friend? Both Jess and Cece found it funny how their roles had switched. Just the other day, Jess was freaking out about meeting Nick and Cece was calming _her_ down. She looked at Jess and sighed. "I like him. I like him a lot more than a friend. I-I think I might, even love him." Realisation hit Cece and she felt sick. "Oh god, I love Schmidt!" Jess smiled earnestly at her best friend. She was the best at helping other people with their relationships but she wasn't the best when it came to her own. "What should I do Jess, I mean I can't tell him!" Cece seemed to be going back into her frantic state but stopped herself, looking into Jess' eyes for guidance. "You can't?" Cece stared at her friend. "Of course I can't. You know Schmidt he won't accept me and I'll look stupid and…"

"Cece. Remember when I was scared to talk to Nick and you talked to me? Do you remember what you told me?" Cece looked at her and didn't want to admit to it. "You told me to stop stressing. You said that it was Nick we were talking about and that he could never hate me. It's the same with Schmidt. He would never decline you, not after all you've been through. You didn't see how he was when you broke up. He was so upset and he wanted to get you back. He told me he loved you. Trust me, his feelings have not changed. I saw the way he looked at you when you walked in. He loves you Cece and I think you need to tell him how you feel. Ok?" Cece was taking in everything Jess was saying and had come to a decision. "You're right. I'm going to tell him!" She smiled before saying "But in my own, okay?"

"Whenever you're ready to!" They smiled and walked out together, holding hands. When they left, their four men were all wanting for them, coats on and ready to leave. "What's going on? I thought we were going to have drink?" Jess looked confused and Nick answered her. "Yeah, turns out the manager saw Schmidt's little boxing match and wants us out. Big Bob stalled him for a bit but now we gotta go." Jess smiled. "No problems here!"

They all made it back in the loft and straight away went for the alcohol and put it on the table. Winston, Coach and Schmidt had already giving Jess a big squeeze, telling her how much they missed her but now it was time for a drinking game, 4D style. They all stood, circled around the table smiling at the game they were going to play. "The game is True American" Winston announced and they all cheered before he shouted, "One. Two. Three. JFK!"

"FDR!"

Everyone was so happy and it finally felt like they were back to normal.

**_To be continued…_**

**_A/N: _**

**_Hi guys. Again I'm sorry. I hope you liked that chapter and I'll try to get chapter seven up as quickly as possible. I'm sorry if that was a little too long and I'd love to hear what you think! I hope there aren't any silly mistakes. Thank you for reading! See ya soon._**


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